George Carlin
Credit: cpo57 on flickr / Licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic

Some people can practically devour an 800-page book, cover-to-cover, in a matter of days.

Then there's people (like me) who prefer to thumb through sections of a book for inspiration on occasion. Rarely do I find enough time to read for hours at a time.

Sound familiar?

I was given the most insightful, serious, thought-provoking, yet hilarious book from my man-servant a few years ago. It's called 3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George by the late George Carlin.[1]

Not many people would peg me as someone who wants to make others laugh - oh, but I do.

"Laughter is the shortest distance

between two people." ~ Victor Borge (1909 - 2000)

Victor Borge - Comedy in Music, Live, CBS
Credit: Piano Piano! on flickr / Licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic

Work with the public?

Carlin's witty observations come in handy

When I began to write online, I made a mental note of what impressed me about certain authors. If I'm going to be buying something online, of course I look for it to be well-researched (like I'm sure everyone does), but I also want to be entertained.

If you spend time searching for reliable information, you'll certainly find preachy, in yer face, marketing pitches along the way. What I wish more online marketers would do is impress me with the truth (which is actually quite funny sometimes).

If you are dependent in any way, shape or form on an audience (be it a boss, co-worker, employees, or the public), you'll definitely find some pearls of wisdom in George Carlin's book.

"Many a true word hath been

spoken in jest." ~ Shakespeare

Portrait of William Shakespeare (1610)
Credit: Attributed to John Taylor / Public Domain

3 X Carlin: An Orgy of George

3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George
Amazon Price: $23.00 $12.46 Buy Now
(price as of Jul 16, 2015)
George Carlin left us at the age of 71 on June 22nd, 2008 - he had an extensive history of cardiac health problems which dated back to his 40s. Sadly, he died of heart failure just a week after his last performance in Las Vegas. R.I.P. Mr. Carlin, you inspired us to speak out - and enjoy life at the same time.

Is his book about funny things?

Nah, it's deep stuff which happens to be funny.

For example, to illustrate the depth of George Carlin's social awareness, here's an excerpt from page 171:

"The way I see it, this country has only four real victim-groups: Indians, blacks, women, and gays." George Carlin reasoned this is because the U.S. is "run by the least morally qualified of the two sexes" and has been for the last 300 years.

Words and phrases we should have:

On page 143, a few of my favorites with George Carlin's definitions:

re-go: to return somewhere

un-park: to drive away

de-have: to lose something

re-get: to find it again

A thought-provoking, yet funny spiel:

From page 635 titled: Location Location Location

"I've noticed that when people speak these days, location seems important to them: and one location in particular: there. They say such things as don't go therebeen there, done that; and you were never there for me.

They don't say much about here. If they do mention here, they usually say, "I'm outta here." Which is really an indirect way of mentioning there, because, if they're outta here, then they must be going there, even though they were specifically warned not to.

It seems to me that here and there present an important problem because, when you get right down to it, those are the only two places we have. Which, of course, is really here nor there."

Short Takes:

From pages 486-7 and 508:

"Two men whose names you see a lot on air-conditioner dials: Norm and Max."

"A crumb is a great thing: If you break a crumb in half you don't get two half-crumbs, you get two crumbs. Doesn't that violate some law of physics?"

Lastly, here's a scenario George Carlin described which I found to be true:

"Have you ever tried to throw away an old wastebasket? You can't do it. People keep bringing it back: Here, Howie, I found your wastebasket in the garbage. Apparently, you have to completely destroy a wastebasket in order to convince people you really don't want it anymore."

3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George is 890 pages that you don't have to read in any set order. I like that.

George Carlin Talks About "Stuff"

A famous 1986 Comic Relief performance (5:09):