Forgot your password?

Cartoon Classics

By Edited Nov 14, 2015 2 2

Cartoon Classics

Circa 1984

Picture if you will, a floor model television, engulfed in a thick, heavy wooden frame. On its face are two giant wheels used for manually changing thirteen channels. A secret panel conceals foreign dials with names like Vertical and Horizontal-Hold. Its remote control is a bulky, archaic device with a grill like a Cadillac and its buttons are worn smooth, after all, there are only two of them. It is 7:00am. In my lap is a bowl of Fruit Loops and I am wearing a two-piece, light blue, plaid pajama set from Zellers. My hair is a mess. I have been patiently waiting for this moment all week. It is Saturday morning, 1984.

Great Expectations

The anticipation of an entire morning of cartoons may seem trivial by todays’ standards. Currently, the average household has over 300 cable stations to choose from; combine that with Netflix, Apple T.V and infinite access to downloads and there’s nothing you can’t find to satisfy your visual cravings. It’s hard to imagine being happy with only thirteen channels and come to think of it...I wasn’t…I was ecstatic. Here are a few of the reasons why.

I Got 99 problems and Smurfs Ain’t One

I would like to officially thank the Smurfs for my early introduction to classical music, alchemy and fear of mushrooms. To this day I cannot eat a mushroom without thoroughly searching for small, blue arms and legs. I know this thought is irrational; everyone knows Smurfs are three apples tall and would never fit into my salad.

Violence and th-th-th-that's, all folks

Vintage Looney Tunes makes the UFC look like dance class. Filled with flying anvils, dynamite and rapist skunks, the average ten-year old couldn’t keep track of the carnage. It was cruel and sadistic but more importantly it was funny; a perfect blend of shotguns, violence and giggles.

A Talking Dog and His Hippie

So many mysteries to solve; was Thelma a lesbian, were Fred and Daphne just friends, how much for a gram of Scooby snacks? The wheels of the Mystery Machine were always turning and with special guests like Don Knots, Batman and Robin and that scary mummy, Scooby Doo was better than Oprah.

Pre-Hollywood Superheroes

The Dark Knight Rises had a budget of 250 million. The Super Friends cost about as much as a large pizza. No glamor, no glitz just in-depth story lines like the time Superman and Wonder Woman were abducted by a race of alien beings and forced to play intergalactic football.

A Celebration of Political Incorrectness

In the true spirit of censorship, Jonny Quest became a target of parental watchdog group Action for Children's Television (ACT) for its multiple onscreen deaths, murder attempts, use of firearms and deadly weapons, depictions of monsters, and tense moments. Perfection.[5644]

Something is Tingling

No matter how many times they used the same scene of Spidey swinging through downtown, it never gets old. The opening theme song also made me briefly want to become a jazz musician.

Best Commercials Ever...

No Saturday morning would be complete without the catchy tunes of School House Rock. More useful than a university degree, those sixty-second spots taught you everything from the creation of a bill to the use of adverbs. It brainwashed millions of us with useful information. What were they thinking?

Whatever your favorite line up, the ritual of Saturday morning cartoons is one shared by generations. Sometimes when I look down at the eighty-four buttons that make up my remote control, I smile and think back to that old floor model television and its thick, heavy wooden frame. Only thirteen channels and I couldn't have been happier.



Nov 10, 2012 4:33pm
Hi--Gret piece. I was raised with Donald Duck and movie-house-cartoons so enjoyed your reporting. 2 thumbs up from me.
Dec 19, 2012 11:21am
It's a testament to how unimaginative cartoons were in the 1980s in terms of originality. Only the Smurfs was a product of that era.

The Warner Bros. cartoons go back to the 1930's, Scooby, Spider Man, and Jonnny Quest all come from the mid to late 1960s, and the Super Friends and School House Rock! were products of the 1970s.

The 80's were hirrible for cartoons -- it was the true begninng of cartoons being nothing more than extensions of advertising ("Care Bears", "My Pretty Pony", etc.) Truly terrible.

Amusing article though, and it is unfortunate that as an Eighties' kid all you got to watch were reruns from more glorious days (Now, I noticed, network TV doesn't even bother creating new cartoons -- they just run blocks of their old material from several years ago and call it a day before segueing into informercials and sports).
Add a new comment - No HTML
You must be logged in and verified to post a comment. Please log in or sign up to comment.



  1. Wikipedia "Jonny Quest." Jonny Quest. 7/11/2012 <Web >

Explore InfoBarrel

Auto Business & Money Entertainment Environment Health History Home & Garden InfoBarrel University Lifestyle Sports Technology Travel & Places
© Copyright 2008 - 2016 by Hinzie Media Inc. Terms of Service Privacy Policy XML Sitemap

Follow IB Entertainment