Happy marriages involve a healthy way of expressing each other’s feelings. If you lack communication with each other, such as expressing your thoughts and emotions, everything else will definitely crumble. The secret of a happy and successful marriage is to become a communication expert. Understand what your partner is saying as well as what lies beneath the message.
Here are the keys of a happy marriage:
- Express your needs to your partner: It is important to tell your partner what you want. Be specific with something you want and need. If you don’t like his manner of throwing away the socks on the floor because it pissed you off, you can talk openly by saying it nicely. You can always communicate with each other nicely to avoid getting upset and frustrated. You can provide a laundry basket where he can easily put his socks away which your partner would likely appreciate. Expressing yourself in little areas could lead to open communication in big discussion areas which are healthy for your marriage to avoid misinterpretation.
- Don’t lean on intuition: Don’t rely on your intuition but instead ask them in some way to express themselves to you. This is to avoid tensions at home, when you feel ill and don’t like to cook, be direct and say “honey, I’m not feeling well, would you mind cooking dinner?” Assumption could be disastrous in a marriage. Express yourself in a kind way that offers understanding of your spouse’s personality which in turn he/she would respond kindly as well.
- Listen to your Spouse: being stopped in the middle of a rebuttal or argument could be infuriating but really it can help. Sometimes you’ve been so caught up with your talking that you forget to listen to what your partner has to say. The best way to do is to set a time to listen to your spouse without interrupting, say for 10 minutes. It will come as a surprise how much you learn and when it’s your turn to do the talking, it makes you realize how much pleasure you get from being able to express yourself freely.
- Prioritize your partner: there are numerous distractions at home that could lead to broken down communications, or wrong interpretation of what your partner is saying such as telephone, television and internet. When your spouse has something to say to you, hang up the phone, turn off the TV and escape from the computer to give them priority. Don’t make your spouse feel like second best as this may create a rift between the two of you. Always listen to your partner when he says something. You can use a psychologist’s technique called “active listening”. The idea is to repeat back to your partner what they are saying until you get it right. One cause of misunderstanding is hearing your partner wrong the first time or not hearing your spouse at all.
Marriage is a commitment of unity and togetherness. To solidify that unity you can use the powers of communication. Treating your wife as a left-hand defending the right one and not just an independent limb. The true marital bond works much better when you spend time and energy to improve communication.