Detection is the key to a multitude of problems when you come into contact with a control freak. For the most part an individuals behavior comes from an area of their being that they are not really aware of. Behavior does not just happen. It is a reflection of the total being. Many scholars stick totally to an environmental basis for behavior while others believe that mainly physical or body chemistry is the main determinate for behavior. I am of the school that the mind controls everything in the body and that the mind is divided into the conscience and subconscious.

A Control Freak some how feels powerless in his or her relationships with other people. The stage is usually set in the formative years which I feel to be after 4yrs old through the mid teens. Behavior modification is performing the desired behavior while eliminating the adverse behavior through a deliberate series of actions. This is my preferred method of breaking this cycle.

When a person gets very upset when things don't go their way this is a sign, when a person goes out of their way to gain information about another person to use against them is a clue, a person behaving in a obsessive compulsive behavior in dress - toward objects - counting spells - blinking episodes - behavior that is repeated over and over with no positive result.

My model of a control freak promotes a need for perceived power that originates from the subconscious mind. They must have it no matter what the cost and this perceived need often spoils their normal relationships. I feel that there is limitless untapped potential in your subconscious. I firmly believe that this is the area that all geniuses tap into. Also realize that the brain is the main instrument of the mind. Let me give you an example! There is electricity and it is harnessed through technology and we wind up tapping into it by sticking a cord with a plug into a wall socket. Now there is also the subconscious mind and it is harnessed by thought processes coordinated through the brain. Our behavior springs from this and if a desired change is to take place one must use behavior modification for 28 to 31 days.

First - disengage from a control freak, second - write down what buttons you feel they are pushing, third - realize that it is not up to you to change them. You simply defend yourself from their negative behavior. It is their responsibility, if they desire to modify their behavior. Remember your key is to spot and deal with a control freak not cure them. They must take this step.