If you’re seeking a sincere Chinese woman as a life partner because you believe, as I do, that an honest Chinese woman, as compared to an honest woman from the Western world, is going to be more committed to building a good life together, more faithful to you and more family oriented, then you’re probably wondering “How do I do that – how do I find an honest Chinese woman to love and to be loved by?”.
The simple answer is that if you take the rights steps, including a little internet homework, you don’t have to do much. Just find and join the right international Chinese dating site, and sincere Chinese women will find you.
The key to the suggestion that a sincere or honest Chinese woman will probably make a better life partner than a woman from a western culture is the word “sincere” or “honest”. A dishonest Chinese woman is no more life partner material than an insincere or dishonest woman from any other culture.
But a sincere Chinese woman will be able to honestly say that your partnership (preferably your “marriage” to her way of thinking) and the family you share (regardless of how many members of that family there might be, maybe it is just the two of you) will always be more important to her than her career. She’ll be able to honestly tell you that so long as you treat her well and are faithful to her, she will never be interested in a relationship or fling with anyone else. It is very unlikely that an honest Western woman will be able to say either of those things in this day and age.
The key to finding the right Chinese dating site is to know what you’re looking for and don’t settle for anything less. Frankly, in online dating regardless of the focus of the site, there are precious few that are reputable enough to be worth your spending your time or money on them.
First let me clearly state the Golden Rule of online dating to prevent yourself from being scammed out of money: “Never Send Money to Anyone You Have Only Met Online!”. If you don’t send anyone money you can’t be scammed financially.
However, by the time they reach the point of asking for money in some form or another and you realize you’re being scammed, you may have already invested a huge amount of your valuable time and your emotions. Finding out that someone you thought might be Ms. Right and were starting to set your heart on can be extremely painful, so it’s important to avoid that too.
Here then, in summary, is what you need to look out for in order to decide if a site is a waste of time, or worse, a threat to your finances and your emotional well-being, or might be a good site for you to give a try.
If a dating website allows you complete and open communication with all members for free then it has to be relying strictly on advertising to cover the costs of operation and enough income to make it worth the owners’ time and effort to operate it. The trouble is that for advertising to pay sufficiently for the income to be substantial there has to be an incredible amount of traffic on the site, and with that incredible amount of traffic comes a bucket-load of work.
To reduce that workload to a minimum these sites invariably take shortcuts, and one of those shortcuts is to stop worrying about who they accept as members. Every free dating site I know of in the Chinese or Asian niches, or in any other niche for that matter, is overrun with scammers. Half the women and half the men on these sites are simply crooks out to con you out of a sizable chunk of your bank account.
There are lots of guys out there who think a dating site should be free, and to them I say “enjoy dating that sweet, sexy little gal who probably is really a big, hairy Nigerian man”. As the old saying goes, “you get what you pay for”, and that is nowhere more true than in online dating.
These are dating websites that are actually fraudulently out to bleed you of a ton of your hard-earned cash, and in the process will also carelessly leave you broken-hearted and kick the hell out of your pride.
Imagine spending anywhere from $300 to $3,000 per month to message with several women and chat with 2 or 3 for a long time, then narrow it down to just one and spend another $5,000 or so just to fly to China to meet her, only to then be told she changed her mind and didn’t want to meet you “because her parents didn’t approve”.
Then, while you’re at the Scam site’s local office (referred to as their “Chinese agents”) you discover that the woman you had fallen deeply in love with was not real, just a paid employee, or if she was real, she was never saying the loving things you thought she was, that was just the translator making up crap. You came to China to meet and marry the woman you had come to deeply love, and instead find out that you’ve been completely taken in by the international Chinese dating website that you had put your complete trust in and paid many thousands of dollars to.
As the owner of a non-scam site that gets a lot of these poor guys after they’ve been had, I’ve heard this same story, or similar ones to it, hundreds and hundreds of times. This article is not about promoting our sites, and I’m not going to name them for that reason. This article is about helping you find the good sites, whether that is our site or another good one. And this section of this article is to help you avoid having your ass scammed off.
When one of these scam sites is done with their victim he is financially devastated, heart-broken, bitter and ashamed. Don’t let this happen to you!
What to look for to recognize a Scam dating site:
- Usually all the women are tarted up to look like sex mad nymphomaniacs, yet described in their profiles as lawyers, doctors, teachers, nurses or successful businesswomen. They look like whores yet describe themselves as sweet, innocent family oriented one women men interested only in you.
- They are frequently self-declared “virgins” that look like hookers.
- Their photos all look professionally done including professional make-up jobs.
- Their profiles usually declare they are fluent in English, but for some reason you are always asked to pay for translation at outrageous rates that will bleed you dry.
- Almost before you have completed your registration you are being accosted by some of these women asking to meet you because they’ve seen your profile and think you’re amazing (although you’ve yet to post a photo or describe yourself). You will continue to get such letters from countless beautiful women for as long as you remain a member/victim.
- Every time you receive such a message you must pay to read it, even after the girl is your “fiancé”
- At no time will you ever be allowed to obtain any girl’s private contact details, even if she has become your “fiancé”.
- To video chat with any girl you will be required to pay a stupidly expensive rate by the minute, and you will also have to pay for a translator/chaperone who will do all the talking for her and for you even though she is supposedly fluent in English.
- The most amazing thing will happen when you start to get wise and they detect they’ve lost you as a paying customer who is looking for love. Some of those same girls who have been messaging you about how much they love you and want to marry you will now start messaging you to ask if you’d like to pay to see them naked on webcam, or come to meet them to have your good friend down below polished and drained, or countless other porn related and sexually explicit propositions.
I guess somewhere along the way since you first signed up, they lost their innocence, and likely their virginity too.
There are probably lots of scam sites that I am not yet aware of, but (if I am allowed to do this) here are the more successful ones that everyone in the dating industry knows full well are scam sites. I am sticking to China and Asian dating sites only since that is my area of expertise, but most of the sites I’m about to name also have sister sites owned by the same operators in every cross-cultural dating niche, especially Russian dating and Latina dating,
Websites that are absolute Scams sites such as I’ve described above include:
- AsianBeauties.com – which also has several fake dating sites that you join only to discover you are suddenly a member of AsianBeauties.com. The one I know very well is DatingChinaWomen.com.
- ChnLove.com – likewise has different fake sites feeding into it. One such site is ChineseWomenDate.com . They also seem to operate under ChnLove.Asia.
- AForeignAffair.com – they have a large Chinese sub-domain, but also operate a front site called LoveMe.com that is identical to their Chinese sub-domain in every way. If you are on one you are on the other.
- GagaMatch.com – I’m not yet certain about front sites, and these guys have not yet reached the level of victims the above three have accumulated. However, they are striving to attain as many victims as the others.
- I’ve received reports on a number of other smaller scale scam sites that operate the same way as I’ve described above, but I have not accumulated such a large number of member reports that I feel I cannot be sued by them. As soon as I have I will update this list with more sites for readers to avoid.
DO NOT GO NEAR THE SITES I JUST LISTED UNLESS YOU ARE A MASSOCHIST!
I also wish to assure you than nobody doing reviews of online dating sites doesn’t know which ones are the scam operations. If you read a reviewer who recommends any of the above sites that person is one of two things:
a) An affiliate of the recommended site who is making a lot of money from referring them, enough money that he has decided to sacrifice his pride and reputation, and your trust and financial well-being, to make some instant cash – ignore his reviews henceforth.
b) A front for the scam operation(s) being recommended. They create these review sites all the time – ignore them.
Sites That Appear to be Good but are Dead
First, understand the following. The few really good Chinese and Asian dating sites are pay sites that charge a single monthly fee that allows you to have full communication with all the women members on the site during the time you have paid for. You are not restricted from sharing your personal contact details with all of them in any way.
The monthly fee is usually somewhere between $30 to $45 per month, and there is a substantial reduction in the per month cost if you buy a longer term. For example, the cost of upgrading for 6 months is the same as you would pay for 3 months if you paid for them 1 month at a time.
One variation on this by perhaps the largest of all Asian dating sites is that they charge one monthly fee that allows you to contact all the women, but an extra fee that allows all the women to contact you. This site is perhaps the largest but is far from the best, because for some unknown reason they seem to offer no protection whatsoever from scammers, and all reports I receive say they are almost overrun with them.
Having said that this form of pay site includes the best of the Chinese and Asian dating sites, I must warn you that it also contains a great number of sites that are completely useless to you and no different from Free Sites (except that you have to pay them).
The reason they are useless is that there is really nobody on them. You’ll be able to tell them by the fact that they have about 2 members join per day. Try searching their women under “Last to Log In” or “Last Online”. If you notice that the girl who is number 16 on the list last logged in about 2 months ago, you can be pretty sure you are not going to meet anyone there.
The worst thing about these sites is that they are clearly not making any money, so they are not able to offer good service, and they are not watching out for scammers. If you don’t send anyone any money who tries to scam you, and you’re only paying $30 per month or so, then you haven’t lost much money in the process, but the time you’re wasting on these sites should have some value, and you’ll be wasting a lot of that.
If it’s a pay site that seems reasonable but has no members, forget it and move on.
What To Look For In A Good Pay Site
- It has lots of fresh faces joining each week and lots of members logging in each day.
- It charges a reasonable monthly fee for full communication with all members of the opposite sex.
- There are no restrictions for upgraded members to give personal contact details to anyone they are messaging or chatting with.
- It has full service video/audio chat. This is absolutely necessary for your security in avoiding scammers.
- Instant computer translation for messaging, chat and deciphering profile descriptions is included at no extra cost.
- It provides advice and warnings about not allowing yourself to be scammed, and educates its members on how to avoid this possibility.
- It acts quickly and responsibly to investigates reports of scammers and removes them from the site when they are discovered.
- The very best of these sites have added security features, including built-in IP checking, notices to members when a Scammer has been caught, a public place where members can check all scammers to watch out for, real blogs and a forum in which the articles and comments come from real members, and which are intended to help members (and allow members to help each other) to not only meet their ideal cross-cultural match, but to succeed in developing a loving relationship that will last.
All of these types of sites allow you to join free but charge an upgrade fee before you can start to communicate with the other members. Don’t be in a rush to pay. Stay on the site for as long as it takes to be confident that it is one of the truly good ones, and only then should you upgrade by paying the monthly fee.
If you follow the advice I’ve just laid out you will be able to find an honest and sincere Chinese or Asian lady who will make a great life mate (and you will avoid having your ass scammed off). There are truly thousands and thousands of these women out there, so just take your time, find a high quality Chinese or Asian dating site, and your dreams will come true.