Today’s society is morally depraved. Immoral activities have taken over virtually every aspect of our lives such that it seems to be the defining glory of life itself. Anyone found to be inactive in matters of intimacy with opposite sex, even if it is inappropriate has almost come to be viewed as queer and awkward. The most saddening thing is that this insipid lifestyle is no respecter of age. Even the elderly and married men and women are no longer dignified in the way they go about their intimate relationships.
However, God expects that in such matters, which he actually invented for the enjoyment f man, should be within marriage. Sadly, man has decreed otherwise, preferring to relate with whomsoever and at anytime, anywhere, anyhow. Men now prefer same gender relationships and this, perhaps, is the most reprehensible of all the immoral sins. Lesbianism and homosexuality are not new though because it was this same abominable reason that God destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah. However, never before has it assumed this height. Incest is now prevalent, wife swapping as well as group orgies.
Nevertheless, God has preserved for Himself a different kind of people among his perishing creation whom He expects to be torchbearers of moral rectitude. These are Christians, called out to uphold the light of God in the midst of dominant darkness that has enveloped the world
“But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people that ye should show forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvelous light” 1 Peter 2:9.
To be different people is to live by different standards and shun the overly moral depravity in today’s society. It means that despite inordinate immoral inclinations of men of today’s world, Christians should be hyper alert in order not to be ensnared by this invasion from hell because failure to do that would be a violation of God’s injunctions, which has dire consequences.
There seems to be a general notion that men are more prone to having extra marital relationships. This article, therefore, is penned to help the Christian husband to safeguard his marriage from adultery.
Beckon on God
Temptation is natural and does not respect anybody. Even Jesus was tempted.
“There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to many…” 1 Corinthians 10:13.
The problem is not temptation but how you respond to it. The Bible actually urges you to seek divine help whenever temptation comes.
“…And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil” Luke 11:5.
So, when next you are tempted, turn it all over to Jesus and He will surely empower you to overcome it.
Cover your flanks
Sometimes, you put yourself in a vulnerable situation and it becomes easier for the devil to take advantage of you. At such moments, you may have some issues to settle with your wife but allow it to linger for more than necessary. That is exactly when the devil would send you a fake comforter, who could even be your wife’s friend or unlikely bait. Because you are weak, your guards are down and you would not realise when you commit immoral sin with her. It follows, therefore, that it is of utmost importance that couples resolve whatever differences they have speedily so that the devil does not have anything to take advantage of.
Men are fond of ogling beautiful women and imagining what it would feel like to get them into bed. This is one of the tricks of the devil because God rates such vile imagination on the same pedestal with the actual immoral act.
“But I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman and lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart,” Matthew 5:28.
So, don’t fantasise intimacy with any woman. Be careful of your thoughts because your action is a product of your thoughts.
“Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life” Proverbs 4:23.
You must put up a thick wall around yourself. It will put off any incursion by conditions that would entice you to infidelity. One of the best walls is to detach yourself from the opposite sex. You must avoid being alone with the opposite sex as well as exchanging friendly banters and compliments with them. Sometimes, what you conceive as mere friendly act or innocent flirtations may eventually foster dangerous affinity that may eventually lead you to immoral sin.
“Why would you be ravished with a strange woman and embrace the bosom of a stranger?” Proverbs 5:20.
It is dangerous to treat adultery with kid gloves because it is a destroyer. Adultery is a stronghold and must be dealt with both physically and spiritually.
“For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds, casting down imaginations…” 2 Corinthians 10:4 -6.
You should confront anything that is capable of ruining your life, marriage, family, reputation and ultimately land you in hell with all the bile in you and bring it to subjection. Unleash the arsenal of prayer and fasting and discipline against the lure of adultery because you are too precious to be messed up.
Don’t overrate yourself and assume you are a superman that cannot be trapped down by the sweetness of illicit intimacy. Many great men in history have fallen and paid dearly for it. Former president of the United States, Bill Clinton, as powerful as he is, still fell to the lure of a mere White House intern, named Monica Lewinsky. King David, an indefatigable warrior, who killed the giant Goliath, was leveled by an ordinary housewife, called Bathsheba. Most recently, David Petraeus, a four star general and former director of America’s Central Intelligence Agency, CIA, as well as commander of the US forces in Afghanistan, lost out to his biographer, a woman, 40-year-old Paula Broadwell. So, if such great men could be defeated by adultery, who are you? Watch out for dangerous signals and take immediate action to stop. Be amenable to correction when you are accused of flirting. Don’t just fly off the handle because that may be true, even when you are yet to become conscious of it. So, face reality and withdraw from such liaison before it destroys you.
Any man that hesitates at the door of adultery is already a victim. The best way to confront this sin is not to give room at all. The Bible does not approve of that; it tells you to just pick race and escape.
“Flee from sexual immorality” 1Corinthians 6:18.
That was exactly what Joseph did when the devil attempted to use Potiphar’s wife to abort his destiny.
“And she caught him by his garment, saying, lie with me and he left his garments in her hand and fled and got him out” Genesis 39:12.
So, do likewise; don’t negotiate with sin. Take to your heels and escape for your life.
The devil is never known to tell the truth; at best he discloses only half of the picture and deceives the unwary. He will tell you that adultery is sweet, which is actually what physical intimacy is, but he will never tell you that such pleasure outside the marital union is short lived and fraught with grief and agony.
“Lust not after her beauty in your heart…for by no means of a whorish woman, a man is brought to a piece of bread…can a man take fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burned. Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not burned?” Proverbs 6:25-28.
There is pay day for every worker and that is exactly why the bible says the wages of sin is death.
It is a common saying that birds of the same feather flock together. In other words, you should associate with people of like interests. Associating with people with whom you have no connection is inappropriate and will create problems.
“Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness and what communion hath light with darkness” 2 Corinthians 6:14.
If you don’t want to commit adultery, bond with men, who respect God, who respect marital vows. If you do otherwise, sooner than later, you will begin to disrespect God and treat your marital vows with levity.
Rev up your physical intimacy
A major cause of adultery unsatisfactory physical intimacy with your wife. You need to rev up your intimate life to shut out the devil from your marriage.
“Let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy youth…Let he breasts satisfy thee at all times and be thou ravished always with her love” Proverbs 5:18 – 19.
If your physical intimacy with your wife is suffering, be open with her and sort it out. Discuss your bedroom problems and preferences without reservation and work hard together to improve on it. You may need counseling where necessary but don’t go outside your matrimonial home in search of gratification; it is a sinful and dangerous thing to do. Those who did, apart from the risk of hell, have brought ruin and disease to their families.
The most potent weapon you can use in your battle against adultery is to align with God. Unfortunately, Satan has exalted immorality and burnished it with so much allure; even married couples now find it acceptable. However, this is against the will of God.
“Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge” Hebrews 13:4.
You may be shocked that adultery has also taken root in churches; both the married and singles, are involved. But you must elect to be different and toe a different path. God will definitely visit His wrath upon adulterers in due time. King David became a victim of adultery with Bathsheba and paid heavily for it. (2Samuel 11 – 13; 16:20 – 22). If David, ‘the man after God’s heart’, could not be spared, what makes you think you would? So, before yield to cavorting with a woman that is not your wife, consider the enormous price to pay. One just hopes you will make the right decision to bullet-proof your life and marriage from adultery to escape the anger of God, who judges righteously and rewards everyone according to his deeds.