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How To Avoid Being Attacked By Ninja's - Part 1

By Edited Aug 1, 2016 0 0

In this day and age many of you are probably thinking "Ninja's? They aren't around anymore." Well that is exactly why I'm writing this guide. To help you prepare for something you probably weren't even thinking about. You're welcome :)

Things You Will Need

To transform yourself from an ordinary person into a "Ninja Aware" person, you will need the following : An open mind, time to prepare your surroundings, time to train your senses in detecting danger, and the ability to adapt to your environment. These will be the topics discussed in this first how to guide.

Step 1

An Open Mind


AN OPEN MIND - Keeping an open mind is vital if you want to avoid Ninja Attacks. First you have to believe in Ninjas, then you have to accept that if you wrong one.... It could lead to you being in a bad situation. Another important factor in having an open mind is that you have to accept that not all Ninjas are heroes like Michael Dudikoff. Sure he saves the day with his Ninja skills, but others use there powers for evil, and these are the ones you want to avoid. Now you may be surprised to hear that more people die of say choking on a piece of food each year than those that are killed by Ninjas, but it is true. Though if you keep an open mind, and think a little deeper it soon becomes clear that the piece of potato chip that killed your neighbor, was more likely planted by a very skilled Ninja! Think about it, how many odd deaths and disappearances do you read about in the paper each day. The only logical explanation is a secret underground group of Ninjas avenging the wrongs done to them, or working for an evil mastermind! That or Aliens...... but that's a whole other article.

Step 2

Preparing Yourself


PREPARATION - Preparing for the possibility of being attacked, or preparing because you know you will be, is another important step in Ninja Awareness. Making sure your immediate environment is safe is where to start. I would recommend not leaving ancient swords or weapons lying around the house, avoid having sharp objects and furniture, and limiting the amount of ninja stars you have on display on your wall to none. Any of these items left out in the open of your home can be deadly if a Ninja sneaks in. You are basically supplying them with a wealth of weapons with easy access. Similarly leaving ropes and intricate gym equipment setup in the backyard will just draw attention to your house as a place for Ninjas to train, and then they will come and you will ask them to leave and BAM! Ninja attack. Even if you don't mind them being there and bring them snacks and fresh lemonade, they may find the drink too sweet, or the snacks aren't the real brand Oreo's, they're the home brand ones.... and BAM! Ninja attack. It would be best to simply not have items that attract them in the first place. Be prepared, Be safe!

Step 3

Sensory Training


SENSORY TRAINING - Being aware of your surroundings is another vital point. Taking time to train your senses to recognize abnormalities in your environment, and develop a heightened state of awareness is something you should not overlook. You should take time to train each sense : hearing, sight, touch, taste, smell, to be capable of detecting dangers to you. Meditation and single sense focused training should get you where you want to be. Listen for weird wind sounds - it could be a Ninja darting past you, or their sword or ninja star whizzing by! Look for moved furniture or weird occurrences - if your lights don't work but the street isn't blacked out, your power could be cut! Is that lamp really a lamp, look closer and you may see that it is in fact a Ninja hiding as a lamp! Feel your bed before you hop in, is that poison needles under the sheets! Check your food, why does the milk smell off? Maybe it is.....or maybe! Have your friends you don't really like taste your soup at the restaurant, no point in being taken out by a bowl of soup! Note - No friends where harmed when making this article.... no important ones anyway :)

Step 4

Master Adapter


BECOME A MASTER ADAPTER - Being able to adapt to your environment is crucial to your survival when being pursued by a Ninja. They have been trained to encounter all kinds of obstacles and accept that things change constantly. You have to be able to do this too. If you have a plan to defend against a Ninja and things change you need to have backup plans ready to go, and be willing to move onto something new if whatever you're doing isn't working. You still need to be prepared, but also flexible and open minded. Note - do not try and turn yourself into an actual adapter like the picture, although it would make you quite POWERFUL! Haha..... is anybody laughing, hello ....



Hopefully this first guide has helped you to become more aware and pro active in your efforts to avoid Ninja attacks. If you have any useful information I have left out, be sure to comment and share the knowledge!

Tips & Warnings

Don't tease Ninjas, they don't like it.

Don't publicly antagonize Ninjas, they will find you.

Stick to your instincts and use the steps in this guide to be Ninja Aware and stay safe :)

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