Throughout life, we all have to suffer through the unfortunate task of ending a relationship. Breaking up with your girlfriend can sometimes be a necessity. No matter how hard you may try to make the situation work, it can simply be impossible to patch the holes to fix the problems. It's a fact of life sometimes that love dies and two people just might not be made for each other. The preliminary process to your ultimate conclusion of breaking up with your girlfriend is the first step.
The Preliminary Process of Breaking Up With Your Girlfriend. Before I explain how you should break up with your girlfriend, you must be positive this is what you want. There's nothing worse than an on-again off-again relationship that runs in circles and brings about constant emotional low points. If you want my advice as to how to break up with your girlfriend, you should analyze your relationship and understand that this is final. Sometimes little squabbles and arguments can result in day long break-ups that just create pointless tears, empty cartons of Ben & Jerry's ice cream, and weeks of annoying backlash and snide comments. The best thing to do if you're victim to a pointless fight is to wait it out. Give yourself a little time to analyze the situation and figure out some sort of resolution, because you honestly don't want to lose the person you really care the world for due to a stupid little argument and a quick burst of rage. Meditate over possible outcomes or talk with her as to how you can overcome your struggle. If you've assessed your situation properly and fully realize that you no longer want to be in your relationship anymore, it's best to know how to break up with your girlfriend. By knowing exactly how to break up with your girlfriend, the process will be much easier for both of you if that's what you wish for.
The problem with ending your relationship is that there isn't one specific answer. People end relationships for multiple reasons and the right way to break up with your girlfriend depends on the specific situation. Throughout this article, I will teach you how to break up with your girlfriend based primarily on the situation that you're in. The following headlines in bold are the specific situation, followed by the best explanation that I can give on how you should break up with your girlfriend. Of course, I'm unable to touch on every single persons intricate love problems, I will speak on behalf of the most popular situations that seem to come up in disputes between dating couples.
A. The Slow Fade of Love - This can be one of the most difficult situations you can encounter. Sometimes we spend such a long time with someone, that the infatuation simply disappears with time. The regularity of dating someone can become mundane and boring. The sparks can easily fade out, and it doesn't necessarily have to be for any particular reason. Disinterest is easily obtained in todays fast paced world, and as humans we're curious as to what else exists in the world. Simply putting up with your girlfriend can be annoying on so many levels if you honestly start feeling nothing for her.
The best way to go about breaking up with your girlfriend in this situation, is the old clichÃ© of honesty. I realize that this idea is thrown around so often when it comes with breaking up with your girlfriend, but in this specific situation, it's the only fail proof way to go about it. You've probably spent quite a bit of time with a person if love has simply faded, so you've became attached to a life with that person. You probably don't have any negative views towards her, so hurting her any worse than you have to is simply unnecessary. By bluntly stating "I really just don't have feelings for you anymore. Nothing specific happened, it's just not going to work out." you can clearly get your message through to her without leaving her to suffer in constant wondering of what actually went on. People like to know reasons for failed relationships, and being 100% translucent with your emotions can be the best way to go about ending a relationship with someone you honestly just don't like anymore. It would be best to tell her in person because this would get the message through way more clear. If she can see the honesty in your face, it will really hit home for her. Be sure to talk about literally everything that went wrong and open up to her. If you do decide to do this in person, be cautious of tears. Many times a crying ex-girlfriend can cause a man to feel guilty and take her back due to her sorrows. If she cries comfort her in the way a friend would, instead of a lover.
Remaining friends with her should be up to your own discretion. Sometimes this can be completely awkward and impossible, other times it can work out just fine. What you want to make sure of, is that a friendship wouldn't give your ex-girlfriend the wrong idea. Sometimes breakups can cause a girl to go crazy, in which case the mere sight of your picture on a Facebook status feed can cause her to have a nervous breakdown and start liking all kinds of annoying Facebook groups that have to do with hating you. Sometimes if you really want to let an ex-girlfriend (and yourself) live in peace, the best method is to simply delete her from all aspects of your life, and drift into the void of complete memory.
B. Constant Fighting - Sometimes girlfriends can randomly become insane once you're knee-deep in a serious relationship. The cause to this is usually the fact that she's become completely comfortable with you and can finally open up to reveal her true nature. You will often find that the girl that you fell in love with was wearing a pretty mask the entire time in order to conceal a horrendous beast underneath. Sometimes the fights are sparked in order to obtain a sense of power on her part. Girlfriends are able to snap one day and start picking at every little thing that you do in order to feel that they are the dominating force in the relationship. If you're the type of guy who can get along and keep your mouth shut when she starts nitpicking, congratulations. Usually a boyfriend is unable to do this, and retaliates with fighting himself. This is completely unhealthy and can be a total unnecessary burden in your life. There are a few good ways to end the relationship, most involve teaching the girl a lesson in human kindness.
One excellent way to end the relationship, is to be a martyr and make your girlfriend feel terrible about herself. The best way to go about this, is to wait until she picks one of her predictable small, stupid fights with you. Lets say she starts arguing with you because you "never talk to her about anything anymore." The best thing to do is to simply nod your head and not say anything. This will most likely cause her to escalate in volume and anger so that she can see that she's hurting you. Once she reaches her climax of anger, simply look her deep into her eyes and say something you know will tear her apart on the inside. A simple, calm, "I'm sorry I can't be the boyfriend you want me to be" followed by an abrupt get away with no further explanation should do the trick. This will cause her to feel terrible for her actions, allow you to break up with her in a noble way, and possibly force her to change the disgusting direction of her life. Chances are that she will call you and apologize, but realize that she doesn't deserve a second chance, and by completely ignoring her, you will be doing a huge service to her being.
If nobility isn't the direction you wish to take, you can always win an argument. Sometimes in situations like this, the best way to break up with your girlfriend is to make her feel like complete crap by exploding in a fury and explain each detailed reason why you simply can't stand her as a person, and no longer want to be with her. If this is the road you wish to take, be sure to have a list of hilariously damaging insults lined up to say to her. It will be more of a satisfying effect if the argument she starts is a small one. If you come out of nowhere with a books worth filled with built up tension she's given to you, you can leave her utterly speechless. The best thing to do is make sure you're completely clever in everything you say. If you belittle her enough, she may change the way she is.
C. Cheating - Far too often, girlfriends creep behind their boyfriend's backs and cheat on them with other guys. You hardly ever find out from your girlfriend herself, but usually from some third-party source who witnessed them together somewhere. The first thing you should do is check the validity of this information. Make sure that the person who gave you the information is not mistaken, and that they have specific facts to back it up, as well as no reason to start random controversy. If it turns out to be a solid truth, the best way to break up with your girlfriend is to simply acknowledge the fact that you know, and ignore any explanation she gives you. If your girlfriend cheats on you, you're obviously hurt, and there's no credible reason she could have for cheating on you. Women know how to tug at their boyfriends emotions though, so in your time of pain, when you here her terrible excuse, you may try to trust what she says. Keep in mind that once a girlfriend cheats on you, you can never have the same relationship back. You will always be cautious of her, constantly doubt yourself, and it will always be cemented as fact that she chose to be with someone else instead of you. Simply let her know that you know what she did, don't bother listening to any explanation, and block her from every aspect of your life. This is the best way you should break up with your cheating girlfriend, because it will most likely help you get over her.
It's an entirely different situation if you catch your girlfriend cheating on you in real life. We've all watched countless episodes of Cheaters on television and have seen peoples reactions once they catch their lovers with someone else. If you catch your girlfriend in the act, remember to keep composure. Don't let her feel like she's hurt you, because this will make you look weak. Act like you really don't care, but let it be known that you're onto her. If you freak out and have a meltdown, start cussing at her and fighting the dude, you'll be viewed as the one who's doing something wrong. Simply act that you don't care, break up with her on the spot, and go home and deal with the grief of the situation in the best way that you can.
D. You've Found Somebody Else - If you're a worthwhile human being, you won't cheat on your girlfriend. Sometimes we simply find other people we're more attracted to, and lose all interest in the girl we're dating; it happens. If you've found someone else, flirted a little bit and received positive results from them, you should wait until you end your current relationship before you start thinking of a new one. Cheating is never a constructive option, because A. one woman is already enough to handle, and B. you don't want to ruin your own personal image by being known as a cheater. If you cheat on your girlfriend, it will be gossiped about for a long time, and women will avoid you if they think you're a two-timer. If you've found someone else, simply breakup with your girlfriend in a nice way, then wait a little bit longer before you start actively pursing your new hopeful relationship. The wait is necessary as an act of human courtesy. It's a lot more hurtful if you breakup with your girlfriend and immediately start dating someone else. It would make all of the difference in the world if you at least waited for her tears to dry before you give her another blow that could possibly send her over the edge into full on depression. You should never rub the new relationship in your ex-girlfriends face because she already feels bad enough that you've found someone better than her.
E. You Need A Change In Life - Sometimes our lives get completely hectic, and having a girlfriend is added stress onto an already stressful life. Our occupations, schools, finances, etc. can already be too much to handle, and sometimes a girlfriend can be the icing on the cake that just makes life almost unbearable. Whether it's the fact that we don't have enough hours in the day, or the feeling of guilt because we can't give a girl our all, sometimes breaking up with your girlfriend may be the necessary change we need in our life to add a little bit of relief. You should never view this as a selfish option, because overall, you should be the most important thing in your life. The best way to break up with her is to do it nicely and try to remain her friend. Sometimes we need to figure out our own lives before we start getting into other peoples. Remind her that it's always possible that you can start dating again once you clear all of your problems up, but that now you need some time alone.
Also, our lives can also seem stagnant and uneventful when we're at a certain stage in life. When we're at our breaking point, we may need to randomly change our lives in order to get through them. If you're simply unhappy, change it by changing yourself. In order to change yourself, it may be necessary to end relations with friends and your girlfriend. If this is the case, explain to her all of your problems with life and that you have a yearning for change. If she truly cares for you, she should somewhat understand.
Conclusion - Before you initiate the official breakup with your girlfriend, realize that none of these options will be easy, but in the long run they will help you out. Once again, equate the situation and make sure it's completely what you want. There is usually no going back once you've broken up with your girlfriend, so you have to be positive that your decision is the right one.
I hope that I've helped you learn the best ways of how to break up with your girlfriend. These are simply options that have worked the best in my own situations (as well as some friends). If you follow the advice for your specific problem, you should reap some sort of solace in dealing with your breakup. I wish you good luck with whatever it is you plan to do, and hope things turn out completely for the best.