They're everywhere: In your family, at school, at work. They don't care about you, they only care about themselves. They are demanding and dismissive.
The reason why they are this way is because they are full of themselves, plain and simple. They laugh you off because they've already pegged you as a mark and unimportant. Above all, they consider themselves more important than you.
How To Spot An Inconsiderate Person
They are totally self-interested. It's all about their shoddy ideas and excessive demands. For this reason they disregard anything you have to say or what you might need. They will not give you a break. They will use you up for their own ends and still demand more. When you voice a concern, they are dismissive. The only one who has value to them is them and whoever they figure is valuable. In this case, they've labelled you as inferior and feel they have the right to disrespect you entirely. You do not exist. Only they exist.
And this is how you can spot them. It's their world, their own little world. They try to get what they want and it doesn't matter how others are affected.
Having a huge ego, they are divisive. It is you against them or you against their group. They are comparative and competitive; you are not as good as them. This, they feel, gives them the right to belittle you or exploit you and to get what they want psychologically and physically.
So, how do you deal with them?
How To Deal With Them
You must be very aware when dealing with a difficult and immature person. When you are fully aware, you can take decisive action. Here are some steps you can take to deal with such a person.
- Realize it's them, not you. You've fallen victim to this person because, ironically, you are considerate and they take advantage of it. You think maybe you're wrong. Maybe it's you who needs to do something for them. But when you see them for who they are, you will know that it's them and not you. This means you must be very aware of what you're doing and what they are doing. You see that their ego is huge, that they are demanding and unreasonable, demand more and give less; that they degrade you and belittle you. And you have done none of these things. You've been considerate and generous. First action is direct perception of yourself, the antagonist and the situation. Then you can act reasonably and completely.
- Avoid them, if possible. Obviously you really don't want to have anything to do with such a person. They make life miserable, use you up and treat you like a non-being. Cut them off from your life completely if you can.
- Call them on it. This means you tell them, as clearly as possible, what it is they are doing. You have seen it clearly, so you have a true picture of their actions and what they mean. Spell it out for them and tell them you won't tolerate it. Possibly, they are unaware that they are being abusive. If so, then they might stop once you point it out. If they are aware that they're abusing you and being self-centered, then they will likely run with their tail between their legs once you've exposed them. They are sneaky, that's their mode of operation; they don't want to be exposed.
- Take legal action. In some circumstances, legal action is possible. Children have made the choice, for instance, to live with the parent they choose when they need to escape an abusive parent. On jobs, there are legal safeguards against someone bullying you in some cases; people cannot discriminate against you or harass you on the basis of race or sex, for instance. In some countries, even some states of the US, there are laws against bullying in general. Are they micromanaging you and not others? Are they making disparaging remarks about men, so that you hear them and feel insulted. Sometimes you do, indeed, have legal options.
The important thing to remember is that the person attacking you has a problem. See them for what they are: Corrupted, comical, absurd and destructive. This is important to realize and why I made it the first step in resolving this issue. Without understanding this first step, you could make missteps, you might back-track and think you're wrong. See the truth, that they are abusive, confused and need to be dealt with; either you must leave them, confront them or take legal action. For your health and well-being, action is necessary. People have even died because of bullying (which is what the inconsiderate person does); they have lost jobs and many have become emotional wrecks and have various medical issues due to the stress of being abused.
And if you deal with them correctly, maybe others will not have to deal with them at all: The fact is, the more aware you are of the situation, the more urgent you will feel that you must do something about it. You need to realize that you are important in spite of the fact that your tormenter has tried to make you think otherwise.