Nearly one in three couples stated that the financial situation is the main cause of stress in their relationship, and 91% of Americans surveyed found reasons to avoid talking about money with your partner, according to a recent poll of American Express Spending & Saving Tracker .
In fact, those surveyed say they "probably know more about the weight of your partner that his salary," according to an online survey conducted in May to 2008 adults by American Express.

However, in bad times, communication is important for couples to overcome sudden financial problems such as loss of work, the experts say. "If you are the spouse that more often manages finances, do not assume your partner knows them as well," says Robert Schmansky, financial planner in Northern Financial Advisors, a firm in Michigan. "Too much communication is better than poor communication."
Here are some topics couples should discuss in the event of a financial emergency:

1. Back to basics. Consumers who face a sudden change in financial status, need to adjust your lifestyle, says financial planner Ric Edelman. 'Can we pay essential bills: housing, auto, electricity, healthcare? You may need to cut costs until you replace the lost revenue. Dave Ramsey, host of a radio program on Finance said that "you can cut many of the lifestyle things, like golf or getting nails done, no matter what." But spouses should agree on how to cut costs, he adds.

Tim Wesling, president of a financial planning firm in Alexandria, Virginia that teaches investing for dummies, says that health care should be a priority. If you lose a job, couples should discuss their coverage options. Among them, transfer to the health plan of the partner who is still able to work or obtain Cobra coverage, which allows former employees to temporarily continue coverage from your former company at group rates.

2. Monitor incoming and outgoing money. Create a budget and discuss it regularly can help the couple to keep track of what both people contribute and spend.

This also helps to identify where cuts can be made. But remember that the nature of your expenses will change after an event that affects your finances, such as loss of employment. For example, laundry bills work clothes can come down, but insurance costs may rise.

3. Confess. Those who spend in secret must confess their purchasing habits, and any accumulated debt, says Edelman.

"In matters of money, there should be no secrets. In the management of money, they should be working together as a couple," he says.

Edelman added that "among married people is very common to have no idea of the income and debts of your spouse. This is the reason that money is a major cause of divorce."

According to the American Express survey of online investing for dummies, 27% of respondents "had distorted the amount of a purchase, while 30% claimed to have hidden purchases from their spouse. Be honest with your spouse it is the best policy and it comes to light in the end any way.

Kathleen Gurney, a psychologist and chief executive of the Financial Psychology consulting firm in Sarasota, Florida, says that couples should be honest about your stress during a financial emergency. "If anxiety is not addressed, people start to pursue bad behavior like drinking or drugs, causing more stress on the family," he says.