Choosing bridesmaids for your wedding ceremony should be fun, but can be stressful. You may be afraid of disappointing some people down by not choosing them, or have cost considerations that limit your options. Follow these tips on how to choose your bridesmaids to ensure as few problems as possible.

How Many Bridesmaids Should You Have?

When choosing how many bridesmaids to have you should think about the size of your wedding. If you are having a large wedding with lots of guest, more bridesmaids may be appropriate. A smaller wedding, on the other hand, will probably be better with fewer. Don't ask people for the sake of it, however, and don't leave someone special out if you really want them. Size of the wedding is a consideration, but not the deciding factor in choosing how many bridesmaids to have.

Cost considerations are also important. Bridesmaids dresses are expensive and gifts for lots of bridesmaids can add up. Your bridesmaids may be able to pay for their own dresses, but if you are buying the outfits, don't forget to think about this when you decide on how many bridesmaids to have.

Having lots of bridesmaids can complicate your big day and the wedding preparations. You don't want to spend the most important day of your life worrying about how your bridesmaids are getting on, so stick to fewer if this is likely to be an issue. Getting lots of people to agree about suitable bridesmaid dresses and come to pre-wedding events like dress fittings and wedding rehearsals can also be problematic. Be realistic and think in advance.

Family Considerations.

This is a tricky one. While you don't want to upset the families unnecessarily, your wedding day shouldn't be spoiled by having bridesmaids you don't particularly want. It can be diplomatic to include some family member who you get on well with, however. A combination of close family members and close friends is ideal. Both your family and your friends will also understand that you can't ask everyone.

Don't Feel Obliged.

Although you may have been bridesmaid at a friend's wedding, for example, you shouldn't feel obliged to return the compliment. Different people have different considerations and your friend will understand this if they truly care about you.

Having Children as Bridesmaids.

Child bridesmaids are cute, but can also add to the stress of the arrangements and cause problems on the day. While older bridesmaids can be a big help to you, little ones require attention instead. You should also be prepared for unexpected hitches if you are having very young bridesmaids. They may cry or refuse to take part, for example. If you do decide to have little bridesmaids, it's a good idea to ask someone older as well to look after them.

Location of Bridesmaids.
Where your bridesmaids live may be important if you want help from them in the wedding preparations and planning, for instance. Organizing rehearsals and dress fittings can also be a problem if your bridesmaids live far away. Thinking about the location of the bridesmaids can be an influencing factor when deciding who to ask.

Other Roles.

Asking close friends and family to take on other roles at your wedding is a great way to keep everyone happy. Simply including them in shopping trips and other pre-wedding preparations can also help make them feel they haven't been rejected.

Talk About Your Choices.

Once you have decided who you are asking, let people know as soon as possible. This gives bridesmaids plenty of notice and stops people from assuming they will be asked. Also explain your choices. Discuss how you made your decisions including cost, family and organizational considerations. This will help people understand better why they weren't asked.


Knowing how to choose your bridesmaids isn't easy, but should be less complicated if you look at each of these factors in turn. Make a list and then cut it down accordingly. Most of all, try not to get too stressed out over your decisions. Talking things through with those closest to you will help.


Bridesmaids in Matching Dresses