Kitchen Mess


The party last night was extraordinary good and you don't remember the last time you laughed this hard. So far, so good. But what happens in the morning?

So you just woke up in a middle of unthinkable mess consisting of dirty dishes, nuts on the floor, empty bottles of beer and greasy bowls of chips? On top of that, you have a terrible headache.(This is why mixing different types of alcohol always ends badly) Not to mention the huge puddle of vomit in the bathroom. Last, but not least, your parents are arriving from their vacation tomorrow morning and now the time is four in the afternoon.

Ah, great. You must be annoyed and wondering how to deal with the clutter. I can relate, because this happened to me several times. As stubborn and foolish as a donkey, I have never learned that inviting fifteen folks in my place without a back up cleaning plan is not the smartest idea.

This is why I decided to share my successful system for dealing with such extreme situations.

Keep Calm!

I know it's easier said than done, but while you are behaving like an irritated bulldog the things are not getting better. Calm your nerves, take a pill for the headache and get ready to action. An appropriate relaxing music will be needed.

Brace Yourselves!

Preparation is king when it comes to cleaning! Equip with:

  • strong cleaning detergents
  • baby wet wipes
  • a good cleaning solution for the dishes
  • nylon bags(small and big)
  • nylon gloves
  • a reliable sober friend(if you can find one)

1. Tackle The Kitchen

Actually, kitchens are often middle “damaged” from the mess after parties. To start with, collect the dirty dishes (which are probably in the living room) and store them into the sink. If you ate a really greasy pizza last night, the situation is pretty serious. Soak them into hot water mixed with detergent in order to soften the litter. Leave them for approximately thirty minutes and let the cleaning games begin. May the odds be ever in your favour!

2. The Living Room

The most “infected” room. Nuts are rolling on your mother's expensive white carpet? Don't even think about the vacuum cleaner. Almonds and peanuts have the annoying habit to cause heavy blockages to vacuum cleaners. You'll have to collect them with your bare hands. Look also for coins and other small objects that can be dangerous. Collect the plastic cups in the nylon bags.

3. The Bathroom

So, whose idea was purchasing vodka and whiskey? And tequila?(The tequila is very insidious)

And the smell! Remember the puddle of vomit I mentioned? You'll have to deal with it somehow.

First of all, buy a new cheap mop and clean the repugnant substance. No cleaning solution is needed in the very beginning. Get rid of the solids first. Once you succeed, apply some disinfectant. Then use the baby wipes to bring some fresh odour to the place.