One of the hardest deaths to cope with is the loss of a brother or sister. This person may have been someone you spent most of your childhood with, someone who acted as a parent-like figure or a younger sibling who you mentored throughout their life. Whatever the case, it is always a difficult situation to deal with. Here are a few tips that may help you or a loved one through your ordeal:
- Cry: Let it out. Whether it be with others or by yourself, it is always best to let your emotions out. I recommend crying and expressing your feelings to someone but I also suggest that you do it by yourself. Learning how to let your emotions out anytime is essential in helping cope with your loss throughout your lifetime.
Remember, after the funeral your friends and loved ones will have to go back to their lives and may not be able to be there for you as they were when the death was recent. Being there for yourself is just as important as others being there for you.
- Don't keep score (too much): after the days, weeks and years pass after your brother or sister’s death you are going to look back and realize who was there for you and who was not. In an ideal world our friends and family will know exactly what to say and when to say it but it’s just not going to happen. Since everyone and every situation is different, it is tough to determine if it’s best to bring attention to your siblings death to show they are not forgotten or to not bring it up because it will bring up a tough time in your life and getting you upset.
If you put yourselves in a friend's shoes, would you know how to react? Unless you been through the same exact situation there is no way to tell.
While being supportive during tough times is part of what a good friend does, do not let only their actions concerning this situation be the be-all end-all of your relationship.
- One day at a time: as time passes, things will get better. It may not seem like it at the time but it will. Your brother or sister's legacy will not be forgotten. Always cherish the memories you shared together. Remember, there are others in your life that need you. Let this experience show you that life is precious and be the best friend or family member you can be. One day at a time.