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How to Date - Part 1

By Edited Nov 5, 2015 0 0

Couple Dating

Finding the love of your life can be an exciting, nerve racking, horrifying, hurtful and rewarding experience.

Most of us have gone through the dating game at one point or another. Some have been lucky and married their high school sweet hearts, while some have become serial daters.

There is no ridged way of how to meet the love of your life. In reality, there are probably lots of people who are basically identical and would make a perfect match for you. But as a normal individual you will only meet a very small percentage of the people in the world so chances are that you may never come across this person.

The only ways to increase your chances are to go out a date. Meet as many people as you can and hopefully you will find someone who is as close as a match as you can find.

The first, and most important thing you will need is a clear cut picture of what you are looking for in a mate. Nobody wants to be dating someone 'just because they were there' or 'just because it was easy'. This is how relationships fail. When people enter into a relationship out of no other reason besides convenience.

You must know what you are looking for. To know what you are looking for, you must know what you want. To know what you want, you must know who you are. I know that's pretty deep, and some people may spend their whole lives looking for their true calling and purpose, but if you know this, it will be much easier to find a partner to share it with.

So first thing you should do, is write down a list of qualities that you want in a partner. These should fall into 3 categories:

  • Personality Traits
  • Physical Traits
  • Resulting Lifestyle Traits

That should also be the order of importance how you value the traits. Remember, you are never going to find someone who is exactly what you write down, but the closer you get, the happier you will be.

Personality traits are things like: Ambitious, curious, adventurous, health conscious, social, intelligent, emotionally stable etc...

Physical traits are obvious. Some say these are not important, but if you are a health person, and you enjoy running and hiking, you are probably not going to get along with someone who is madly overweight. Again, if you enjoy sex, you probably won't have a healthy relationship with someone who doesn't have a similar sex drive. Dont be to specific here but still have a few boundries.

Resulting Lifestyle Traits: These should be less important than the above two. Because if you have aligned personality traits, the lifestyle traits can be moulded and adjusted to meet. Plus if your underlying traits are similiar but the exact lifestyles are different, you will find the other person even more interesting as they will inject new activities and situations into your life that you will enjoy.

Let's take a few of the above personality traits and how they could create different lifestyles:

  • Ambitious: Career driven, likes to learn and develop themselves, is an entrepreneur, dedicated to music, writing, dancing. Any of these can represent ambitious. Just because you are an entrepreneur, doesn't mean you won't get along with someone who is very passionate about their writing career.
  • Curious: Likes to try new food, experience new things, read new books etc..
  • Adventurous: Like to do extreme sports, likes to travel, learn new languages, meet new people
  • Health Conscious: Likes any kind of sport or physical activities, enjoys healthy eating
Having a solid set of criteria you are looking for is not only important for you to ensure you find someone that will match your personality, ambitions and lifestyle, but the person on the receiving end will also find you infinitely more attractive because you have standards and you have selected them based on traits that they will also value themselves. Whether you are a girl or a guy, people like to be recognised for and related to the things they are passionate about.

I will go through the actual dating process in future articles, including where to meet people that match your list, how to meet them and how to start dating them.


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