How to Have Better Relationships

We all want better relationships and it's not that hard if you understand people. However, if you're clueless and hop from one relationship to the next doing the same thing over and over again getting the same result, which by the way, is the definition of insanity, then it only gets worse instead of better.

Many people who try to have better relationships end up breaking up and this includes marriage relationships. One of the problems is a lack of understanding. They do not understand each others needs; because they're caught up in their own need aka selfishness.

Then to make matters worse, they opt to find someone else who they think will understand them better and this perpetuates the cycle. When all they needed is to focus outside themselves and get another perspective.

To have better relationships you need to place yourself in the other person’s shoes. The problem is that many people are self centered and want it their way, so all they think of is how they feel and have no idea how the other person feels.

On the other hand, there's the enabler or codependent that only feels what the other person feels and has lost all concept of who they are. All they think about is pleasing others and are attracted to people that show no respect for them and usually end up with abusers who feed on their pain.

The thing is that most people are in denial on their issues or baggage, so they swing back and forth in a state of confusion. The pendulum sways in extreme fashion to this over here then that over there. There is no sense of moderation or balance, which creates an emotional roller coaster, so up and down they go through life.

Then, if they're lucky, as they get older a big drama will unfold and they will get desperate enough to seek help. By the way, there is no shame in seeking help, in fact, if more people would do this there wouldn't be so many break ups.

So it seems, to have better relationships we need to be willing to look within to see if there's something wrong with us and then do what needs to be done to remedy it. Once we work through the issues, whatever they may be, we will finally be available for a healthy relationship.

Sounds easy when you say it, but trust me it isn't. That's why so many people won't do it! Nevertheless, it's what has to be done or else we end up in dysfunctional relationships with people that end like all the others before it.