Each February there is a holiday that forces all people either in relationships or single to dread its arrival. That is when the 14th arrives and with it, the day of love. It doesn’t matter what your relationship status is, the day is going to be filled with pressure and probably not the least bit enjoyable. Single people are lonely and see that they lack that someone special. Those in a relationship focus on how much money they spend on their love rather than what that relationship should mean.  Here are some ideas to make this so called holiday a little bit better.

If you are in a relationship then hopefully it is healthy enough for a simple and open give and take. Instead of making it about the money that can be spent showing the world how much you love each other.  Make the meaning of the day about the love that you feel for each other. Do something special for the other person that makes them happy.  It isn’t important how much money is spent.  You don’t have to get a dozen roses at work in order to know that someone loves you.  Set a rational budget and make a commitment to do something that makes you both happy. That is a real celebration of your love that will remove the pressure from the situation.

For those who are single this Valentine’s Day there are many things that you can do to have a great day and not feel badly. First of all do not tie your self esteem to your relationship status. It doesn’t have anything to do with what type of person you are.

One of the best things that a person can do is realize that until you are friends with yourself you can’t be in a healthy relationship with anyone else. In that vein, do something nice for yourself on this day. Buy yourself a special gift to let yourself know that you care.  Don’t spend the day focusing on what you don’t have, focus on what you do have. There are a lot of Valentine’s Days in your future and you may never spend another one alone. 

Finally there is always the foxhole mentality that can get you through this day. Find a quiet place and stay there ignoring all that this day brings. Emerge from your hole in the ground on the 15th as if nothing had happened and it is just a normal day. This can be a good alternative to wallowing in self pity or feeling sad because of the unreasonably high expectations this day brought you.