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How to poop properly

By Edited Apr 1, 2016 0 0

Have you ever wondered if you are pooping correctly?

95% of the world's population will think about pooping etiquette at some point in their lives.

This article has been written to assist you in understanding proper pooping procedures (PPP).

Before you begin pooping, you must decide if you truly need to go. If not, wait until you are sure that you need to poop. Many times, people will struggle to force out a few stringy lumps in order to avoid having to drop a larger deuce at less convenient times (on a date, in a car, in a pool). This strategy will often end in failure. See, poop has a mind of its own; if it is forced out too early, it will retaliate by getting stuck in the rectal opening, with the only means of removal being a tactfully clenched wad of toilet paper. This will inevitably lead to excessive wiping due to the fact that there is still just enough poop in your bung hole to leave marks on each consecutive swipe. This could then cause anxiety about your ineffectiveness to properly wipe, which will cause more wiping. Bleeding will soon follow.

If you have come to the conclusion that you surely do need to poop, you should locate the nearest toilet and sit on it. You should then attempt to force the poop out of your body. This can be rather difficult at times, especially if something is hindering the poop's progression. If this is the case, you probably don't need to poop yet (refer to previous paragraph).

If you find that the poop is easily exiting your body, then you are executing the task perfectly. You should continue with your mode of operation and expel as much poop as you feel necessary (you don't have to poop it all out at once--some people choose to save some poop in their system in order to remove themselves from uncomfortable situations later.)

Sometimes, you may experience wet poop, more commonly known as diarrhea. If this is the case, you should place a few pieces of toilet paper in the bowl as a target for your liquid turd. The toilet paper will act as a cushion for your poopstream and will prevent splashing.

That's about it for pooping. In conclusion, pooping is quite simple; however, you should not underestimate the problematic social implications of poor poop etiquette.

Ziegel Von Stuffen



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