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If You Are Not Happy with Your Life Change It

By Edited Jan 23, 2014 4 10
King Kong Nabs Two Willing Victims
Credit: PegCole17

How many happy friends do you have? Can you see their faces as you imagine them in your mind? What makes some people happy and others dour? Did you know that happiness is a choice?

Each of us wake every morning with this important choice as we begin our day: We can either choose to be happy or choose to be unhappy. Circumstances do not dictate our state of mind. We do.

This may sound too simplistic for the doubters or the chronically unhappy many who enter our lives at every turn. To the few who choose happiness, the world offers an unlimited array of opportunities.

Some choose happiness by counting their blessings. These folks are grateful for good weather (even when it's raining), a close parking spot (or one that requires a brisk walk), earnings (whether monitary or not), overall good health (disregarding minor ailments), a clean comfortable place to live, a working car, a job, a loving wife or husband, a caring parent or child . . . you get the idea. Focusing on the things that are good often takes our mind off the things that aren't.

Zig Ziglar says we each need to do a "Check up from the neck up". What's that about? We must daily monitor our thoughts and focus on the positive things that are going on in our life. Gratitude opens the door for blessings. Cynicism closes it.

One of my favorite speakers tells a story about our choices. He says to imagine a large sign hanging over your head every morning when you awaken. On one side is a sad face and on the other side is a happy face. This is your daily menu from which you choose how you will approach your day. Not to minimize the difficulties that each of us face daily, keep in mind, "It's not what happens to you that makes a difference. It is your reaction to what happens that matters."

Imagine yourself as a parent who has two children. One child is always grateful for anything you do for them. "Oh, Daddy, that bike is the most wonderful gift I've ever received!" The other child finds fault with everything you give them. "Why did you get me the blue bicycle when you knew I wanted the red one?" Which child would you most likely do more for? Of course, it would be the happy, grateful child.

What if our heavenly benefactor reacts the same way as we would? For the happy, grateful child he rewards them with more of the good things in life. For the cynical, complaining child he gives them more of what they are good at doing - complaining - so they get more to complain about.

For those who don't believe in a higher being, take a look at how your current state of unhappiness is working for you. So far, has your approach been successful? It is if you really want to be unhappy. You've been there, done that. Why not try a different approach and change the way you look at your life? What have you got to lose? You're already unhappy.

Start by smiling when you don't really feel like it. Some may say, "Well that's just a fake smile." And to that I say, would you rather see a fake smile or a genuine frown? You'll be surprised at the results you get when you smile at someone. You may even lift someone else up when they're down. Who knows, they may be worse off than you.



Jun 30, 2010 6:53pm
Thanks for the article on changing your life if you're not happy with it.
Jul 1, 2010 10:02am
snowfence - You're welcome. Hope that your smile brightens someone's day today.
Jul 5, 2010 9:30am
So very true, some people do not seem to see the good side of anything. We are a long time dead so we should make the most of a happy life before its too late. great article. thanks rated up
Jul 5, 2010 10:10am
Eileen - Unfortunately it is true. The volume of hate and vengeance on TV tells a story about our social direction. We've come a long way from the summer of love. You've said it well. Choosing happiness and making the most of our short lives is truly important. Thanks for your comments.
Jul 7, 2010 12:47pm
Hi thinkwrite17; What great advice from Zig Ziglar, to do a "Check up from the neck up." I believe that it is not the circumstances but what you believe about the circumstances that forms your attitude, and for me, being thankful in any situation is a result of my faith. You have written a wonderful article, thank you!
Jul 8, 2010 3:49pm
Introspective - wow, thanks. I love Zig Ziglar. He's so easy to follow and understand. He's helped me look at things from new viewpoints over the years. I admire your Attitude of Gratitude (Earl Nightingale) and your faith that keeps you strong.
Jul 20, 2010 5:04pm
this is very good advice, love the comment about sending more to complain about because that's what the complaining child is good at. You've made me smile today, thank you: If You Are Not Happy with Your Life Change It
Jul 21, 2010 8:51am
Hi Sharon - Thanks for dropping in to comment. Nice to meet you here. That story comes from Ed Foreman, a former member of Congress and professional speaker. He's terrific! I met him when I was in outside sales. Later he gave a free workshop to the business school where I was teaching. Great man. Very funny.
Jul 25, 2010 12:57pm
Hi, I agree happiness is in our control. I have an article about how to be happier as well. I am always working on it.
Sep 5, 2010 3:57pm
Jaydoo - You know it. We manufacture our own state of mind. Thanks for agreeing and I'll look for your article to read.
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