Your friend is getting married and she asked you to be one of her bridesmaids. You’re happy for her, but all you can think of are all the afternoons you’re going to have to spend shopping for designer wedding dresses, listening to problems with finding the right band, helping to deal with the caterer or figuring out the seating chart, not to mention the costs of the bridesmaid dress, the bridal shower and the wedding gift. Being a bridesmaid can seem overwhelming, but with the right attitude and approach it can be a lot of fun too, so stop concentrating on any possible negatives that may or may not take place and focus on the positives which will definitely be happening in the months leading to your friend’s wedding.

As a bridesmaid you will definitely have responsibilities, but tackling them as tasks will only make you resent your role in the wedding, so instead of approaching what you’re asked to do in a business like manner, look at everything that needs to be done as if it were an opportunity to have some fun with your bride friend and the other bridesmaids.

When shopping for the gown and bridesmaid dresses, rather than thinking you won’t be able to sit through another portion of designer wedding dresses, concentrate on the bonding experience. Even though there will be sales people and possibly other bridesmaids around, along wit the bride’s mother or sister, you’ll be put in a very intimate setting having a chance at a face to face regarding dreams and expectations, to talk future plans, past experiences and just be together without saying a word, just taking everything in.

If you’re asked to be part of the menu and cake choosing team, don’t think about coming home after hours spent in some kitchen, smelling of vinegar or grease, but rather wake that flavor loving part of yourself that will enjoy getting to try new things, coming across old favorites and facing interesting twists on classics, from truffle flavored mashed potatoes to white chocolate cake with raspberry cream. A bite here and a bite there will make a great dinner, and together with some fun conversation it can be a relaxing time where wedding is only a reason you’re there and not the only thing in the world.

Band auditions, bridal shower and bachelorette party can be noisy and lengthy, but at the core they are nothing more than parties, so throw your hair back and get loose a bit. Sure you have to put the shower together, plan the menu, the venue and the entertainment, and when listening to bands, those good and those not so great, you can get a headache, but if you approach it with no pressure and decide to enjoy it, you will, it’s that simple.

Te more you stress over being a bridesmaid the more nerve wrecking it will be. You will feel the tension in your headache and twists in your stomach. But as soon as you start thinking of your friend’s wedding as big, fun party, you keep her in check so she doesn’t turn bridezilla on you and just do your thing completing every bridesmaid task on time, you’ll see that instead of a scary undertaking you have a pleasant event ahead of you.