Don't let this happen to you! There are things you can do to keep the spark alive between you and your loved one during deployment. Here are a few:
Keep in Contact:
The mere act of keeping in conta
Don't think you have to use snail mail - thanks to technology there are many ways to stay in contact without having to break out a stamp:
Video/Voice Conferencing (like Skype)
Special secured forums set up by the military for family communications
Just keep in mind that no communication line is entirely secure. Depending on the mission your loved one is on, communication lines could be actively or passively monitored by military officials or sensors to ensure confidential information is not disclosed. If you're not comfortable having a stranger read the steamier parts of your latest love letter, you might want to leave those out. That goes for sexy chats across the phone and internet too.
Leave Him A Few Surprises
Before he heads out, tuck a few "surprises" into his bag to find when he's unpacking. Maybe you write a few naughty notes or get some sexy "boudoir-style" pictures done and hide them in between his uniforms or inside a book for him to find later. Or you could leave a pair of sexy panties in his bag with a note saying that you'll wear a matching set when he comes home. Either way, make sure it's something special for you two.
Give Him A Few Keepsakes to Remind Him of Your Love
Some military spouses create special
Others have done the same thing with videos – converting videos of the kids and their wedding to digital format and posting them on youtube or added it to their iPod so their deployed spouse can view them anytime they way.
Send Care Packages
When you're out shopping, always keep an eye out for things that your deployed spouse might like, such as magazines, candy, trinkets, snacks, music, videos, etc. Once you have a box full, package it carefully (the post office and military forces employ gorillas for handling overseas packages), and mail it out. Make sure to toss in a supply of their favorite soap, shampoo, or perfume / aftershave – those sorts of things can be in short supply when deployed.
If you really want to be his or her champion, send extras of the treats and candy so he can share with his buddies. Group stuff, like games and videos, are a big hit too.
Celebrate Special Occasions
One of the hardest parts of being de
On your loved one's birthday, send a cake, candles, plates, and napkins for him or her to share with their buddies. You can make the cake yourself or have a
ry that specializes in such packaging, like Bake Me a Wish, do it for you.
If a cake seems like too much of a hassle or too expensive, then send him a box of his favorite snack cakes (like Little Debbies), along with the plates and napkins so he can have his own little birthday party with his platoon.
Send Christmas gifts to your loved one. Think small – these guys and gals need to stay mobile. Some possibilities include iPod, handheld games, CD's, drawings from the kids, T-shirts, pictures, treats, etc.
Find small, inexpensive items that he can give out as gifts to his friends or platoon members on Christmas Day.
Send decorations for their barracks – even the cheesy stuff you find at the dollar store will be a welcomed addition to their dreary barracks.
Take videos of Junior's birthday celebration or the family's Christmas celebration, making sure to include a personal message to him so he knows he's remembered on the special day.
Help Him or Her Stay In Contact With The Family
Family is a big thing for your deployed spouse. Make it a point to keep them up to date on what's going on in the family. For example, take picture every day of you and / or the kids and email it to him. Take extra pictures and videos at family gatherings so even if he can't be at Great Aunt Ira's 100th birthday, he can feel like he was there. Have family members record greetings and help them upload them to the internet so he can watch them. Your extra work helping her keep in contact with the family will be greatly appreciated and demonstrates how much you love her.
Trust Him or Her
This is the most important tip
Even when your mind if filled with doubt, do not say or write anything that may be interpreted as you not trusting him. Even if his latest email home mentions one of his female platoon members, it doesn't mean that they are doing anything. Keep those dark thoughts to yourself – mentioning them will only drive a wedge between you.