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Long Distance Relationships in Zero Steps

By Edited Jul 14, 2015 0 0

It's easier than you think.

From Toronto Ontario to Hamilton New York, it is a five-hour drive commitment- but it could be worse.

 And after almost two years of figuring out how the whole thing works, I am happy to say it is easier to figure out than they make it seem. But let me back up a bit.

 When two people have established their relationship with one another, it is always going to be a looming fear when one half of the team is about to get traded. Deciding if your team is capable of a maintaining a long distance relationship can be incredibly eye opening, and sometimes it can be a deal breaker.

 But if you’ve both discussed it thoroughly, and agreed that your relationship deserves that impressive will of commitment, then there is really only one thing you need in order to sustain it: You need to want it. 

Does that sound too simple? Perfect, it should. Do not complicate something that has already been figured out. You want it, and they want it. That is how it will work. 

Being part of a long distance relationship myself, it is frustrating to think that people follow the “steps” that others advise in order to have a “successful” relationship. I am here to tell you that there are no steps you can follow. Long distance is a day-to-day, conscious effort by two people. Steps are far too general.

No two days are the same, and some days are absolutely harder than others. Sometimes they are too busy, some days the Internet is down and Skype does not work. Once in a while you will get ridiculously jealous over absolutely nothing, and other days you are both just too tired of not having the other around.

 If a couple wants it to work out, they will get passed it.

It would be so easy to throw in the towel after a fight, and if that is the case, maybe long distance really is not for you.

 But take it from me. Problems in long distance relationships usually stem from the completely innocent emotion of missing your partner. You want to take part in their daily life, and they feel the same. Keep that in mind the next time you come to a crossroad. The option to go cry, talk to, and touch them is not an option, and that can be hard.

 But here is the silver lining. You are still together, because you want to be. The countdown until you get to see them again is like having Christmas six times a year. That Skype date that didn’t work out will be re-scheduled for the very next night, and the birthday they missed will be celebrated the next time they’re home. As long as you want to wait.

 Steps to long distance relationships do not work. Each couple is unique, and each requires specific things depending on who is involved. It is a daily decision to uphold and fight for the relationship. When two people are truly committed to the long haul, that is what makes it last.

 Every couple has their ups and down; their disagreements, and their triumphs. Being far away from them, everything you are fighting for is based on that fact that you both think that the other person is worth it. Figure out what is worth fighting for. I did. 

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