Marital infidelity should you really forgive and forget
Marital infidelity is common today as getting married. Most marriages never even make it past the first year. The general saying till death do us part no longer holds true. There have been a lot of debates about what constitute marital infidelity. There are those who would say that looking at another person doesn't count as marital infidelity. Others say that looking with lust counts as marital infidelity because if the person is given the chance, he or she will act on it. What are the chances that you marriage will end in marital infidelity. The chances are high and that has nothing to do with cheating. Most marriages fail even before they start. What about the popular saying that you should forgive and forget after marital infidelity?
Marital infidelity: Can you really forgive and forget?
Well, you need to understand that you will never forget. Forgiving and forgetting after marital infidelity doesn't mean you will wash those painful scenes off your memory. It just means that once you have decided to forgive your unfaithful spouse, you will not bring up the marital infidelity every time an argument arise. That is of course easier said than done. There are those who prefer to lie to themselves saying they have forgiven but they will never forget. That is not forgiveness especially when it comes to marital infidelity. If you want to forgive but you don't want to forget, there is no point in staying in a bad relationship.
Marital infidelity: Why some choose to forgive and forget?
There are those who have taken a step back to analyze their lives after marital infidelity. They have taken a much pragmatic approach. It is less emotional and more in tune with the reality of life and the effect of marital infidelity. If your cheating spouse begs for forgiveness and you have checked the cost of getting a divorce and living on your own. If you feel you will be worse off, you will probably want to forgive and forget and concentrate of the financial benefits of staying with an unfaithful spouse. That might sound devoid of love and romance on which most fairytale marriages are built. That being said, marriage is not a fairytale and love with constant financial problems doesn't always last. As a former Hollywood celebrity once said, "don't get mad, get everything". When marital infidelity puts your mind in jeopardy, you need something to take your mind of things.
Marital infidelity: Forgive and forget by going on a revenge binge
There are those who think forgive and forget after marital infidelity is about going on a sexual revenge binge. Well, you will get your sexual satisfaction but you will not find peace. If you want to punish your spouse for what he or she has done to your marriage, you will be the loser. If you can't stand being around your spouse after marital infidelity, you will be better off leaving and putting an end to your marriage. Sexual revenge is not sweet no matter how you look at it. Paying marital infidelity with marital infidelity just doesn't add up.
Marital infidelity: Why did everything go wrong?
In order to be able to forgive and forget after marital infidelity, you need to also understand what when wrong. If you don't understand, how are you going to prevent a reoccurrence? It might actually be your fault or you might have directly or indirectly contributed to the marital infidelity. Forgive and forget also implies that you are willing to work towards rebuilding whatever is left of your marriage. If your spouse is truly remorseful, that can make it easier to forgive and forget. Finally, you are the only one who can make the decision to forgive and forget after a marital infidelity.