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Mothers Day, Is it wrong to love and think about ME

By Edited Dec 6, 2015 1 2

Mother's Day, Is it wrong to love and think about "ME"?

From infancy we have been inculcated with the idea that we should all pursue righteous virtues. You should look out for others and try your best to be generous. We live in a "me" world and expressions like "Greed is good" are perpetually thrown at us. A Freddy Mercury (Queen) song says, "We are the champions and no time for losers". This song implies you try your best to defeat others and let them eat your dust. As a mother, wife and lover, how do you cope with the guilt of thinking about "me" when others are involved?

To deal with this, you need to step back in time before being a lover, wife and a lover. At that time, it was about you. However, you wanted to share and experience the joys of togetherness and starting a family. You probably didn't understand what you had to sacrifice to find fulfillment. After so many years of giving and feeling of not receiving, you long for the good old days when it was all about you. Those days a long gone and now you have to settle for something different that brings along its joys and challenges. Does it mean you cannot go back in time to recreate those carefree days? Not quite! How can you achieve this? Here are a few tips that you might find helpful.

Mother's day and Time: You don't need to wait for a yearly fictional mother's day to take time off for yourself.

Mother's day and Centre of the World: You are not the center of your family. Contrary to what you might have read and what you might feel, if you were to die, your children (new mother) and spouse (new wife) would still carry on without you. If you can understand this simple fact, you will frequently take the time to think about me.

Mother's day and Help: Another way to think about "me" is asking for help. You are human and cannot not perform all the task in the house alone. It is a sign of strength to recognize your limit. If it cannot be done today, there is always tommorrow and there is no need to feel bad about it.

Mother's day and Training: Training your children and husband to do things around the house. Everyone who eats in your house should know how to cook. Yes, they will not be as good as you but at least you will give them the honor of showing their culinary skills from time to time. That will also give you time to rest and take your mind of the others. Remember, they will not die just because they have to good once in a while.

Mothers day and Desire: If you want something, don't waiting for your other half to surprise you. He cannot read you mind. So if you want to love "me" and not feel guilty, just speak out and ask for what you desire. This can be gifts, eating at a nice restaurant; going on vacation without the children, etc. By the way, the children could probably do with a little vacation away from you. Your children do not always need you. That is the truth and you will have to get over that.

If you love yourself and are reasonable about how you go about achieving it, you will feel better and will be able to give more to those you love. Is it wrong to love and think about "me"? Definitely not!



Jun 16, 2010 1:57pm
Very good read!
Jul 17, 2010 3:12am

Your article was a pleasure to read and so very true. Like you say just because we are the 'mother' does not mean you have to muti task everything. I agree with teaching everyone who lives in the house to help in some way (I had to along with my two sisters) It teaches independence.

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