Most probably all people need and want to have good friends. But if you asked people what a good friend is like you would probably hear hundreds of qualities that a good friend should have. It also means that if you want to be a good friend you also must have all those qualities. But what kind of a superman or superwoman you have to be then. If you try to analyze those requirements you will quickly understand that in order to be a good friend you must be perfect. Is that possible? You answer that question. So, I was thinking about the topic one day and came up with some answers.
First of all I firmly believe that we cannot have all the positive features that people expect us to have and we should not expect others to have all those wonderful character features. I even think that from time to time we will fail to display essential features, although I believe all of us could have them. Another thing that I understood is: being a friend is not a thing that comes naturally, we have to try and do something to make and keep friends. As we human beings tend to be egoistic, we will have to work on our character to become people we want others to be. In this way we will be able to be true friends to others and this is the only way other people will become good friends to us.
Secondly, I believe we have to learn accepting people as they are and stop trying changing them according to what we expect them to be. Each one of us is unique and there will never be another one like that in the entire world. Therefore, we have to allow people just be themselves, who they really are believe what they believe and say what they think. If we are able to do that, then we are equals. If somebody can dictate to another one and that has to obey, this is not friendship but a relationship of a superior with a subordinate. I believe no one wants this kind of friendship.
Thirdly, I believe there should be some give-and-take between friends. This again helps to keep them on a par with one another. If one is always giving and another one is always taking could that type of friendship be called healthy? I think it would remind more of a relationship between a parent and a baby kid. There should be a balance in relationship. We give but we also receive and in this way no one feels abused.
Fourthly and I would finish with this one - trust. This feature should be present from the very start of friendship and be ever present in any kind of relationship. If you do not trust each other, it means you are not true friends. In fact, I do not know why you try to be friends or what still keeps you together. Maybe you have some sort of business interests, but if that is the case I doubt if that type of friendship last long. You can be sure, if something goes wrong distrust will separate you very fast.
And finally I must add that you should be able to forgive one another. That feature protects you from splitting when things go wrong. Things do go wrong, misunderstandings arise, and gossip goes along. What do you do? Be open and forgive. Your friend is not perfect and neither are you. So learn to forgive and your friendship will go on. This attitude will help you to make and keep good friends.