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Save My Marriage From Divorce

By Edited Nov 13, 2013 0 0

If times are challenging in a relationship, you may find yourself trying to save my marriage from divorce. There are so many married individuals and couples that are in the same boat as you are. The good news is that there are many techniques that enable loving couples to re-ignite their passion for one another and save a marriage from divorce court.

The important thing to realize is that marriages require work. Nobody ever said that being married was going to be easy and there are many married people who are willing to give up and get a divorce at the first sign of troubled waters. However, couples that are willing to work together and do the necessary work have an excellent opportunity to rebuild their relationship and enjoy a healthy, happy marriage.

So how can I save my marriage from divorce?

The first step is to identify that there is a problem and that you are willing to work on it. Many couples get married with nearly a blind eye to the challenges that will appear in their relationship over time. For this reason, it is not surprising that more than half of all marriages will ultimately end in divorce. But, for couples that are willing to rededicate themselves to their relationship and follow a few simple instructions, the chances to repair a troubled marriage are excellent.

The first step is to face facts. No, your marriage has not been the fairy tale dream that you imagined it would be when you were a child. You have had challenges and difficulties. In fact, if you are like the average married couple you have faced everything from infidelity to financial troubles to health problems to job loss -- and yet you continue to fight. Regardless of what happens in your relationship you can at least take solace in the fact that you did not give up without a struggle. And this is the fact that separates the failed marriages from the marriages that become reborn.

Now, considering the challenges that you have faced in your relationship, it is important that you take stock of the progress that you have made and the positive elements in your relationship. Many marriage counselors recommend that each partner take a little bit of time to write down the high points in the marriage and the positive things that make it worth fighting for. By writing these feelings down they will become more concrete and you can refer to these notes whenever you begin to doubt whether saving the marriage is actually worth it.

The next step is to ask for and accept outside help. In all relationships it can important to get an unbiased outside view from time to time to give you feedback on the things that you are doing well and the things that need improvement. Many couples report that couples therapy with a licensed marriage counselor has given them new perspective and insight into their relationship. It is only human nature to have trouble seeing the bigger picture when you are involved in the day to day living of something.

If money is tight then a professional marriage counselor might not be the answer. But getting outside help is still important in helping both partners to renew their commitment to the marriage. For this reason there are other non-profit options that should be considered. For instance, most churches offer some form of marriage and couples counseling with a member of the church. Most often these sessions are provided as a service and there is no charge.

The important thing to remember when seeking counseling to seek out an impartial third party. You should never ask a friend or family member to one of the partners to serve as a mediator during counseling. It is important that both people in the marriage feel that the counselor or moderator is coming from a place of neutrality.

Finally, in order to save a marriage from divorce, it is important that you try to empathize with your partner's feelings. Take a moment and get out of your skin and try to look at conflicts from the perspective of your spouse. If you do this, it is likely that you will gain new insight into where he or she is coming from and the things that they value in the relationship.

It is possible to save your marriage from divorce, but it will not be an easy process. You must continue to try to seek understanding with the knowledge that your marriage might not work it. But you will feel better if you are sure that you have made an honest effort to preserve the marriage.



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