Self Care

RachelB | Aug 26, 2009 |

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Self help writers speak often of the need to "be your own best friend," but what does it actually take to achieve this worthwhile goal? What are the specific steps involved?

First, make up your mind to treat yourself with the same loving kindness and respect that you may typically reserve for other people. Many of us go to great lengths to treat other people well while continuing to treat ourselves shabbily. Being your own best friend means treating yourself as you would treat any of your other good friends.

Treat yourself to something that you like and that also makes you feel good about yourself. For instance, if you are trying to lose weight, don't treat yourself to an ice cream sundae, as this may only cause you to berate yourself later. Rather, treat yourself to a manicure or a haircut, or anything else that feels good and can enhance your self-esteem in the process.

Take time for yourself. When you have a lot of responsibilities (such as a spouse, children, a job, volunteer work, etc.) it can be hard to carve out time for yourself to do something fun or just to relax. When you make a point of spending quality time on yourself, this is just one more way to remind yourself of your own intrinsic value as a person.

Explore your interests. For instance, if you have always loved gardening but have not had a chance to garden lately, try to find a little time in your schedule to get back to gardening and your other favorite hobbies.

Genuine self care never needs to come at the expense of your other precious relationships. In fact, when you treat yourself well, you feel better about yourself, and you also have more to give to your relationships with other people.