Staying calm when things just tick you off!
I bet your reading the title stay positive in any situation, learn how to, and possibly thinking "but that is not always possible", my answer is no, it is not always possible but can be attained to and helped along with practice.
There are things that you can do to train your mood and there for your actions, it just takes practice and patience. What do you think the difference is between someone who sits feeling that the world has done them wrong and there for succeeds in nothing , and the person who realises that their destiny is in their own hands and focuses their energy on what they want and goes for it? Positive thinking and positive behaviour.
Things to keep in your mind at all times to train your mood
- Take a few minutes every morning to say to yourself in a mirror what you are truly thankful for. We spend a lot of time seeing others with things that we do not have in life, whether that be material things, people or emotional things, money, belongings, children, partners, love, whatever. Do not be negative and think of what you wish you had, think of what you do have.
- Surround yourself with positive people. In the world of economic crisis and social networking, it is very easy to hear every one else's problems and see all the disasters of the world and make them add to your own. If you have friends that are overly depressive, as much as you want to be there for them, do not jump in and drain your emotional resources. It is bad for them as much as you, as it gives them a crutch and a dependency on sympathy and leaves you feeling bad for them all day. Sometimes their problems are even of their own making in the sense that they wish to remain victims of their situation and all your energy is wasted. Surround yourself with the friends that have positive attitudes, that are upbeat. I am not suggesting you bail on your friends when they need you, but there is a difference between a friend calling out when they genuinely need emotional support and people who spend each day hating their life.
- Remind yourself that you are the captain of your own ship, and you alone have the power to steer yourself to where you wish to be. Focus on what you wish to succeed in and go for it, just keep working towards that goal.
Most of us can try and stay calm when left to our own devices, but when we have an irrational person in front of us physically or online it can be difficult to learn to dealt with. There are a few things that you could start to train your mind to keep calm in these situations.
- Never answer in the heat of things, if you are online, walk away and give yourself a few minutes to think how you really want to reply to the imminent situation, do you wish to escalate it just to win the battle, or would you rather remain calm and defuse the situation and win the war?
- Remember that just because you become upset at a disagreement and may become upset if someone disagrees with you, feeling that means they do not like you, does not mean that the other person has the same emotions. Most people do not care if another person disagrees with their opinion and really does not take the disagreement to heart.
- Sometimes don't say anything at all. If there really is not a lot that is to be said to a person screaming and shouting, just let them shout it out. Once they have run out of steam they will be waiting for your response to feed from. Simply ask them what they wish you to do for them or what they want to come from this discussion. They will become baffled and realise that actually there is no practical need for their shouting. This type of situation dissolves very quickly with no response from you and sometimes you will actually find yourself getting an apology. Your positive attitude deflects their anger, as I have had plenty of experience with this scenario as I use to be a customer service advisor, and you do not get people more unhappy than when they have a purpose to complain.
- Remember that it is not your job to keep everyone happy and that you won't ever manage that. Some people will want to wallow in their misery and nothing you say will change that, you will just absort the negative feelings of that situation, and go away just as depressed as they are. Give them a positive statement to hold on to and then stay away from that emotion. Sometimes people have genuine pain but they need to feel that so they can realise what the good things in their life are.
- Remember that the word Impossible it self says I'm possible, so aim for what you wish to accomplish, even if you fail, you will learn something along the way. Many things were learned by mistake.
There will be many instances in life where you will find it extremely easy to fall under the spell of negative emotions, but remember to stay positive in all situations because even in the darkest times there is something to look positive about, even if that positive is just the hope that things will become better in time. It is however always more positive to be physically motivated to turning that hope in to a reality.
Look yourself in the mirror and say I can lose weight! I can get that job! I can be successful! I can be happy! Let yourself be happy.
Quick recap of main points to staying positive in all situations
- Take your time and think about what you wish to say in conflicting situations.
- Sometimes it is better to say nothing at all.
- Think about how you can make things happen, tell yourself you WILL make your aspirations happen.
- Failure is not an option, only another attempt is an option.
- Stay away from people who draw negative emotions and surround yourself with people who can see the positive in most things.
- Keep your voice and thoughts in a calm manner at all times so your anxiety is not what feeds your negative emotions.