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The 7 Grossest Creatures To Ever Wash Up On Shore

By Edited Nov 13, 2013 9 12
Ontario(62487)

Ahh, a romantic stroll on the beach. There’s moonlight, a warm breeze, soft waves lapping at your toes and a putrid, rotting carcass that smells so bad you can’t help but throw up. So. Romantic.

For some people, this is an unfortunate reality. All around the world, unlucky beachgoers have stumbled across the bodies of mysterious creatures that no one can explain. Some look like they’ve been rotting for 5 centuries, while others appear to be the offspring of an everyday farm animal and something you’d see from a whale watching boat. Whatever they are, they’ve been baffling scientists for decades. And they’re gross.

Montauk Monster

Montauk
Credit: Wikipedia

Two women found this lovely carcass on a beach in Montauk, New York. It’s rumoured to be a hoax because the body was conveniently never made available for testing (it’s supposedly rotting in an unnamed person’s backyard), but still. It’s cool. Those who believe it’s real think it’s a diseased dog (weird), a raccoon (not as weird) or a sea turtle (really weird). This is what a sea turtle looks like, in case you've forgotten. Please compare.

Montauk(62472)
Credit: earthsfriends.com

Panama Creature

Panama
Credit: telemetro

A year later, this tasty treat was discovered in Panama. According to the rumor, two kids saw it hanging out near a cave and beat it to death. That’s a big fat lie because an autopsy determined it was the decomposed, bloated body of a hairless sloth. Please notice the resemblence (especially the claws):

Panama(62475)
Credit: unknown

Ontario Beast

Ontario
Credit: dailymail.co.uk

In the town of Kitchenuhmaykoosib, Ontario, two ladies were out for a pleasant morning hike when their dog decided to fetch the grossest thing possible. He dropped this weird beast at their feet and they, along with the rest of the world, had no clue what it was. Despite its resemblance to the offspring of a rat and a boar, most think it’s a raccoon. Whatever it is, it has lovely fur.

Ontario(62477)
Credit: pictureshunt.com

New Zealand Dinosaur

New Zealand(62478)
Credit: gennet.org

While trawling for mackerel off the coast of New Zealand, a Japanese fishing boat pulled up something that was definitely not mackerel. According to a guy from Japan’s National Science Museum, it’s not a whale, a fish or even a mammal, so by default it’s a dinosaur. A plesiosaur, to be exact. How can a dinosaur stay somewhat preserved for hundreds of millions of years, you ask? Well, it might have been mummified on the bottom of the sea and eventually floated to the surface. Or, it might have been alive the whole time. Too bad we’ll never know because the fishermen threw it back in the ocean. But either way, it does look a heck of a lot like this artist’s representation of a plesiosaur:

New Zealand(62479)
Credit: discoverynews.us

Scotland Mystery

Scotland
Credit: dailymail.co.uk

A woman out for a beach walk (typical scenario for finding yucky creatures, it seems) stumbled upon this 30-foot skeleton in Aberdeen, Scotland. Most people thought it was some generic Nessie-type monster, while others believe it’s a plain old pilot whale. Decide for yourself:

Scotland(62481)
Credit: cms.int

Russian Sheep Shark Thing

Russia(62482)
Credit: englishrussia.com

Russian soldiers found this tasty treat in the most eastern part of Russian. At first glance it looks like an alligator, but it actually has skin with fur, and what appears to be sheep’s head. Like most monsters, the corpse was whisked away for “in-depth studies” and nobody has heard anything since.

China Monster

China(62483)
Credit: thesun.co.uk

This gnarly sea monster washed up on the shores of China in June 2011. It’s 55 feet long, and despite its deflated appearance, it still weighed in at 4.5 tons (i doubt they flopped it on a scale, so I’m not sure how they arrived at that number). The main theory is that it’s a coelencanth, which is more commonly known as a dino-fish. Coelencanths were thought to have gone extinct 65 million years ago but were rediscovered—alive—in 1938. Actually, its fossils were discovered well before a live specimen!

China(62486)
Credit: berkeley.edu
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Comments

Oct 24, 2011 8:01am
Scaevola
A-mazing!
Oct 25, 2011 1:12am
SimplyPaul
A very strange but very cool article.
Oct 25, 2011 2:42am
BohoGypsyArtist
Those are incredible. Too bad about those finds that were whisked away for "in-depth" studies and never to be heard of again. I guess there are still things in this world that will continue to mystify and surprise us.
Oct 25, 2011 8:51am
footloose
I love your writing, and this funny article. Good work!
Oct 25, 2011 10:41am
alwritetea
Hilarious, awesome and creepy. Very well written too!
Oct 26, 2011 12:07am
triken01
This is nice... Very interesting
Oct 27, 2011 2:00am
mockingbird
I'm stunned by that sloth.
Oct 28, 2011 1:13pm
GodHandFemto
Awesome article. Actually made me google more info on some of these.
Mar 24, 2012 3:38pm
ramona69
The 'Ontario Beast' is definitely an otter. 100% NOT a raccoon. It doesn't look anything like a raccoon.
Apr 29, 2013 2:39pm
JadeDragon
Crazy creatures, and yet people deny the existence of the Ogopogo and the Sasquatch.
Mar 3, 2014 2:50pm
RoseWrites
So interesting, it's too bad the New Zealand dinosaur was thrown back in the ocean. And for sure, some of these are clever hoaxes.
Mar 4, 2014 7:03am
vicdillinger
The best line here: "Whatever it is, it has lovely fur."! BRILLIANT! A thumb!
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