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The Best Horror Movies You Don't Dare Watch

By Edited Nov 15, 2013 0 1

It's universally accepted that horror is split into two genres. The artistic kind with good story development and deep characters and the kind that just throw blood and guts all over. I'd like to think that the movies I picked here are a very potent and deadly mixture of both worlds. I wouldn't suggest watching all these movies in one night, it's not a great idea. Prepare yourself for a lot of sexual abuse, rape, animal abuse, and mental trauma. I love horror movies, they are pretty much all I watch but the movies below left me quite throughly violated.

The movies below contain heavy plot spoilers, but honestly, after reading the plot you won't want to watch the movies. I may have saved you some mental scarring.


You know those weird foreign movies you watch sometimes in the Independent Film channel just to make yourself feel cultured? Irreversible is a lot like that. It will leave you sincerely confused and will make you have to google search what you just saw to make sense of it. The director, Gaspar Noe, wanted to make a movie that left the viewer feeling as sufficiently violated as the girl that gets brutally raped for a good five or ten minutes of film time.

He succeeds.

The thing to know about watching Irreversible going into it is that the whole movie is in reverse. The beginning is really the end, the end is the beginning. To add onto that your senses are frequently assaulted by seizure inducing light flashes and a camera that spins so much it's likely to make a sailor sea sick. It's those kind of things that made me hate Cloverfield, but I was so darn confused the whole time I gave myself a headache because I would not stop watching.

The plot of Irreversible is really quite simple, but it's presented in a way that makes it seem complex. The movie technically starts with a woman in the park reading a book, the image starts to swirl and fade to black until a barely visible image of the cosmos is visible. The screen then reads "Time Destroys Everything". Real art school kind of bull.

It cuts to the girl, Alex and her boyfriend Marcus in bed after sex. She tells him that she might be pregnant, which Marcus is thrilled by. He goes out to get some wine while Alex takes a shower and uses a home pregnancy test which confirms the pregnancy. Sometime later they arrive at a party with their friend Pierre who is also Alexs' ex-boyfriend. Alex is furious with Marcus because of his alcohol abuse, use of drugs, and flirtatious advances towards women at the party so she leaves.

Alex traverses through an underground tunnel where she walks in on a man called The Tapeworm beating a transsexual. When The Tapeworm spies Alex he lets the transsexual go and threatens Alex with a knife. He proceeds to rape her on screen for what seems like an eternity. When he finishes he mercilessly beats her and leaves her writhing in pain.

Later, Marcus and Pierre walk home from the party and come to the crime scene where police bring out Alex. Marcus cries hysterically over her body and finds out that she is in a coma. Two street thugs offer to help Marcus and Pierre take revenge on the rapist who, if caught by the police, would just end up in a cozy prison.

The find the transsexual that The Tapeworm was assaulting previously. She was reluctant to talk at first, but Marcus threatens her with a piece of glass. She identifies the man and says they can find him at a BDSM club called The Rectum.  They go to the club and find The Tapeworm standing next to another man. Thinking the other man is The Tapeworm, Marcus assaults him, but is wrestled to the ground and has his arm broken. The man attempts to rape Marcus but Pierre grabs a fire extinguisher and beats the man to death with it. The police arrive and arrest Pierre and Marcus, this is when they find out that the real Tapeworm was standing next to the man watching the whole scene.

That's the plot, but it's in reverse. Clearly, this movie is not for the faint of heart.

Irreversible (English Subtitled)
Amazon Price: $1.99 Buy Now
(price as of Aug 9, 2013)

Cannibal Holocaust

Cannibal Holocaust was the father of the found footage film genre that was made super popular by The Blair Witch Project some twenty years later. This movie was so graphic that after it's premiere in Italy, the director was arrested for obscenity charges. The authorities thought that he had made an actual snuff film, however, he was clear. Though the movie is still banned in Italy and many other countries because of it's animal cruelty. The animals that were killed in the movie were actually killed during the movie. So if you have a soft spot for animals, this film is not for you.

The movie starts with a documentary about a film crew that got lost on an expedition to the Amazon to do a documentary on the native cannibal tribes. The team consisted of Alan, the director. Faye, his girlfriend and two camera men, Jack and Mark. A man named Harold Monroe is charged with leading the rescue team to find them. When he arrives he meets his guide who have taken a hostage Yacumo tribe. The guarantee his release if he takes them to his village. When Monroe arrives at the village, the natives are hostile because of the brutality the lost film crew had shown when they passed through there.

The next day, Monroe follows a group of Shamatari warriors to the river bed where they are preparing to fight a tribe they are warring with called the Yanomamo. Monroe intervenes between the groups and thus saves the smaller group of Yanomamo warriors. They take him back to the village where he visits a shrine which holds the bones of the lost film crew. Initially angry, Monroe manages to trade a tape recorder for the film reels. However, first he is forced to take part in a cannibalistic ceremony.

Back in New York, the producers want to make a documentary on the footage Monroe recovered. However, Monroe states he wants to watch it first. The footage starts with a group coming upon a turtle which the promptly butcher and eat. Later, their jungle guide is bitten by a venomous snake, they amputate his leg in order save his life, but he died and is left behind by the group. The group happens upon a Yacumo in the forest. Jack, one of the camera men, shoots the native in the leg so that they can easily follow him back to his village. When they arrive at the village, the group forces the entire tribe into a hut and burns it to the ground in order to stage more exciting footage for the documentary.

The station is still adamant about showing the documentary. To persuade them, Monroe shows them the last bit of unedited footage. The documentary team happen across a young Yanomamo girl, the male crew members proceed to rape her while Faye tries to stop them. Later the team films the girl impaled in a spike from her rear all the way through her mouth. The insist it was the natives who did this, but from their tone it's clear that this was another staged scene. When they move on, they are attacked by a group of Yanmamo warriors who are seeking revenge for the girl.

Jack is hit by the spear and Alan shoots him so they can film how the native mutilate his corpse. As they try to escape, Faye is captured. Alan attempts to rescue her, but Mark continues to film while she is raped and beheaded. The movie ends with a shot of Alan's bloody face.

The movie is truly something shocking to behold, but some insist it's a commentary on civilized society and uncivilized society. You know, how we are worse and more violent that what we refer to as savages. This film can be truly persuading to that point.

Cannibal Holocaust (Unrated)
Amazon Price: $29.95 $18.99 Buy Now
(price as of Aug 9, 2013)

The Human Centipede 2

human centipede 2
The Human Centipede was pretty much expected for this list, but most people don't know that a sequel came out in 2011. It was worse, way worse than the first movie. I know, how could they possibly make it worse? Of course, you just add more people to the mix.

The story follows Martin Lomax. He has a dream, a simple one and that is to make his own human centipede, but with TWELVE people instead of just three. Martin Lomax is a mentally challenged man who works at a parking garage and lives with his suicidal and abusive mother who blames him for sending his father to jail for sexually abusing him. Every week, Martin has therapy with Dr. Sebring who prescribes him heavy medication and also sexual abuses Martin.

I'm warning you now, the rest of this is very, very graphic. Read at your own risk.

His disturbing life aside, Martin has developed an obsession with the Human Centipede movie. He keeps a scrapbook of the movie and even has a pet centipede in his home. He eventually rents out a old dusty warehouse after killing the man that owned it previously. This is the start to his devious dreams realization. Martin captures twelve victims which include an hot headed man and his girlfriend, a man who complains about the ATMs having no cash, two drunk women who caught Martin masturbating with sand paper, a muscled man who threatened to hurt Martin and his mother for complaining about his loud techno music, a rich man and his pregnant wife, a cab driver, a prostitute who was in a car pleasuring his therapist Dr. Sebring, and finally the actress who played Jenny in the Human Centipede. After killing his therapist and his mother, he begins work on his monster.

While the first Human Centipede was graphic, the sequel makes you thankful it was actually a doctor doing it. Martin is no doctor, so the only knowledge he has when making the centipede is what he learned from the movie. Martin begins to sever the tendons in his victims knees and uses a hammer to knock out their teeth.  Martin slices the buttock and uses a staple gun to staple it to the face of the next person.

During the process, one man bleeds to death from a  sloppy incision and the pregnant woman is presumed to be dead. After he assembled the centipede. He tries to make the actress who plays Jenny eat, as she it at the head of the twelve person long centipede. She refuses so he feeds her soup with a funnel. Martin is disturbed by her cries of anguish so he pulls out her tongue. Seeing that the soup is not working as quickly as he'd like, he injects each person with a laxative so they have violent diarrhea into the mouth of the person behind them. After laughing hysterically for awhile, Martin vomits from the smell. After he gets the amazing idea of wrapping his genitals with barbed wire and raping the woman at the end.

During this, the pregnant women that was presumed dead goes into labor and runs out of the warehouse. She locks herself in a car and has her baby into the foot well. Martin tries to break in, but she slams on the gas pedal and escapes, crushing her newborns head in the process.

While he was outside, one of the men in the middle breaks awa creating two centipedes. This angers Martin so he starts shooting each person. When he runs out of ammo, he cuts their throat. The actress from the Human Centipede movie punches him in the genitals and uses the funnel to put his pet centipede in Martin's rear end.

The movie ends with him in the parking garage watching the Human Centipede and leaving the viewer wondering if that was all in his head or not.

The Human Centipede 2: Full Sequence
Amazon Price: $24.98 $10.03 Buy Now
(price as of Aug 9, 2013)


Jun 2, 2012 6:09am
I have seen The Blair Witch Project, but not the movies that you review. You make good reviews. I don't know whether it is a question of 'to dare', but after reading your reviews then I don't want to watch them. They sound very scary!
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