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The Best of Craiglist-Humor at it's Best

By Edited Jun 15, 2014 0 3
Craigslist Front Page
Credit: google images

For several years now Craigslist has been the place where sellers and buyers find each other for free.  The website that was originally started as an email listing of friends in San Francisco is now a worldwide listing site for almost anything.  One of the other interesting things about Craigslist is that people will post just about anything.  Below I will share with you some of the crazy listings that made the Best of Craigslist page:

1.      The gator that ate my pot bellied pig- Jan 2012-I need help catching the gator that ate my prized pig. My pig (Rudy Belle) was wearing a very expensive necklace, a generational necklace, which was in my wife's family for years. The emotional distress I have had from losing my pig is nothing like the stress I will receive from my wife if I don't get it back. It happened at the Blue Cypress Golf Club and it scared the bejesus out of me. I spoke to management and they said there was nothing they could do. If anyone has found the necklace or has seen this gator (has a weird blotchy snout) pleasssse contact me.  Thanks, Jimmy T.

2.  Are You a Ghost Surfing the Web?-Oct 2011- Documentary style program is looking to contact a ghost on the internet. If you are DEAD and reading this, please respond! What is your name?  How did you pass away?  Why are you surfing the internet?

 3.  Jogging Partner-May 2011- I am looking for a person of athletic build to help me get in shape. I hate exercising with passion so the plan of action is this: I ingest Rohypnol [you supply the roofies as I don't know where to purchase them] and you strap my body to yours [limbs to limbs using velcro] and take me along on a jog. Three nights a week. If you're capable and interested, E-mail me so that we can discuss the fee.

 4.  Free Cello-Dec 2010- So my sister gave me this cello a couple years ago. It's a nice cello. Actually, it's a great cello. It's probably the best cello, but I don't really know much about cellos. Also the neck snapped off. Of the cello. So it's really more like 3/4's of a cello, but the other 1/4's still there, it's just not attached. It's kind of like you're getting two cellos, only one of them doesn't have a body and the other doesn't have a neck. But if you stand them up next to each other it's like old times. You could probably fix it with like some music glue or something like that.

She also gave me a cello bag that I can give to you too, now that I won't have a cello. It's a really nice cello bag. You can fit everything in it. Actually, there might even be a bow in the bag, I'm not sure. I don't want you to think that there's 100% a bow in the bag. It's way over there, I can't check right now. But if it's in there it's yours. If you're like me and you don't know how to play the cello then you could use it as a coin bank. It's hollow and there are two S's on the front that you could drop the coins through. Then when it's filled up you could drop it off of your roof or carry it around like a change purse.

Ooh, in the cello bag. It'd be like a cello purse. I'd do it but I'm moving across the country and it won't fit in my car. What else could you do with it? You could saw the front off and use it as a sled. Or give the neck to a baby as like a wizard stick for Christmas. Totally give this cello to someone for Christmas. Or Hanukkah. Please come get it. I'm in Echo Park. I'd actually go somewhere to meet you if wherever we're going is a cool place. Like the desert or something. I'm 90% certain the bow's in there.

 5.  1500 live ladybugs, accidently bought while drunk, feels bad.-December 2009- So, after getting a little too drunk on thanksgiving a friend and i decided to buy 1500 live ladybugs from amazon, which was a great idea until they came in the mail. Now they're sitting on my windowsill and I have nothing to really do with them. If i set them free they'll die in this weather, if I leave them on my windowsill they'll die.

So, if you have a greenhouse or some kind of animals to feed them to it'd be awesome. I don't want to ruin 1500 lives. Email me and tell me what you’re gonna do with them, and if you can come pick them up. And they're yours.

I hope you got as much of a kick out of this as I did.  Not only can you find great items on Craiglist, but apparently you can find great humor as well.  Enjoy!!

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Comments

May 4, 2012 1:18pm
Jisawesome
I a tip, your title is a bit confusing. I'm not sure if it was a mistake? Using best before and after the dash makes It se redundant.
May 12, 2012 11:12am
aguy
Very creative.

My favorite was #5 - the one about ladybugs.
May 13, 2012 8:52am
tkmcdonald
Thanks aguy. I really enjoyed writing this article. I laughed all the way through it.
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