Do you really know what your mother wants for Mother's Day?
Here is a creative list or a good laugh!
“Hello, Everyone! This is your wandering reporter, Mr. Fixx, Shaun Fixx, bringing you today’s timely interview with the greatest ladies in the world. Who else but the World’s 10 Top Mothers!
Mother’s Day is coming up fast and it’s a day to show your mother how much you love her. If you are in a quandary trying to find the perfect gift for your mother, I am here to help you.
As you know, not all mothers are created equal. Each one is a unique personality yet all are women we love and cherish. I am here today to ask these lovely women to tell us a little bit about themselves and what would they consider as a perfect gift on Mother’s Day.”
Shaun Fixx: “Hello ladies! I am pleased that you could all be available for our Mother’s Day interview. So much has been advertised and promoted as the best presents for Mother’s Day. It would help many children, young and old, to know what you think.
To give us a better insight, can you please tell me a little about yourself and what you consider as the best Mother’s Day gift you can receive.”
Yummy Mummy: “ You can tell from my glamorous looks, Hollywood is to blame for my existence, dahlin’. As female celebrities found fashionable ways to display their baby bumps on the red carpet, the Yummy Mummy fever just caught on. It’s a no-no for us to have a bump if we are not pregnant! My children are the best dressed anywhere too. I think the best present on Mother’s Day would be a by- invitation-only pass to an exclusive designer shopping spree. Better than a dream vacation! I have to look the part you know?”
Hot Momma: “I don’t know about you but I don’t need no fancy designer clothes to be hot. You be a Hot Momma if you look as fabulous and as attractive as me! My bumps look good in front or behind me (wink, wink) and I make the clothes look good! My kids get their good looks from their momma. A picture of beautiful me in a frame or even a mirror is the best present for me."
Groovy Mama: “Well, even before both Yummy Mummy and Hot Momma came along, I was already spreading the love. I’m not competing with the fashionistas, I’m fine with my comfy and sometimes mismatched and colourful outfits. I treat my kids like one of the gang and let them do what they like. I will be happy with a relaxed family gathering and just eat at home. Just don’t forget those “organic brownies” for dessert, really cool. Peace, man.”
Tiger Mom: “What’s all this talk about fashion and relaxing? I have no time for these things. I keep
a very tight schedule to make sure my children excel academically and in everything else. They must work, work, work! I know what’s best for them and they will thank me when they become the president or CEO one day. A data organizer or planner would complete my Mother’s Day but an A+ report card would top that.”
Stage Mom: “I’m totally with you when it comes to making sure my kids are doing their best. Practice, practice and more practice makes perfect. That’s my line. It’s a cutthroat world out there and we have to be the best. Nobody is going to take advantage of my children, except maybe me. For Mother’s Day, a giant tote bag to fit everything I carry around all day would be the perfect gift for me.”
Soccer/Hockey Mom: “Tiger Mom, tell me about tight schedules! I wake up at the crack of dawn, prepare breakfast, load the kids in the car and drive a million miles to daily practice. I live in athletic wear and a ponytail. But I love my kids, sweaty uniforms and all. One day they will make it to the big time, that’s the game plan. I’ll take some relaxing spa time with Groovy Mama for Mother’s Day or any day.”
Cooking/Gardening Mama: “ If it’s home cooking you want, you came to the right place. I’ll cook you up a storm with stuff from my own garden too! Mothers like us are often good at crafting as well and like to help out at our children’s school when we have the time. I love spending time in my garden and cooking from recipe books. I love Martha Stewart! A family outing like seeing a movie would make me happy on Mother’s Day.”
Big Momma: “Hey, Cookin’ Mama, can I come over to yo’ house? I’m yo’ tough lovin’ mama. I expect my girls and boys to go to school or they get a whuppin’ from me. Dat’s right, I ain’t raising no hoodlums in dis here house. Everybody lives in dis house, children, grand children, cousins, aunts, uncles. We are one big family. Dey better not forget Mother’s Day, I’m lookin’ forward to a great big meal at de fancy eat-all-you–can restaurant.”
Mamita or Little Mommy: “Oh, your home sounds so lively big Momma! Everyone calls me Mamita or Little Mommy because I love to take care of everyone including my friends, office mates and neighbours. If you ever need anything, ask me. It’s probably in my bag or I will know what to do. I love all children and I take extra care that they don’t get any boo-boos or ouchies. Sometimes they say I am too fussy and protective but I am just scared they will get hurt. I would love a bouquet of flowers and a lovely card on Mother’s Day!”
Super Mom: “Flowers, a card, clothes, a bag, a movie or a meal all sound great as Mother’s Day gifts. I already have an organizer, I’m Super Mom, remember? I can sew my kid’s Halloween costume, take them to piano lessons, join the PTA, hold down a full-time managerial job, take yoga classes, volunteer, change a tire, write online articles ….. name it, I can do it! I’ll do anything for my children. A perfect gift for me would be an e-reader because I do love to read on the go!”
Shaun Fixx: “Wow, thank you very much Mommies! It has been fascinating to meet all of you and hear your interesting thoughts and opinions. Your answers will surely help those clueless shoppers. Any parting words, ladies?
Tiger Mom: “We are all different on the outside but we all love our children, deep inside, in our own way.”
Mamita: “The best present is not where you get it. What is the largest diamond ring if they are not there to express their love and appreciation? I will cherish a simple handmade craft from school more than a ring if made with love.”
All Mothers: (in chorus) “Yes!””Cool.” “Agree!” “Das right!” Correct.” “Amen.”
Shaun Fixx: “Very well said! Happy Mother’s Day to you all! Now let’s all go try out Cooking Mama’s home cooking.”
Yummy Mummy: “You can all come to my posh home. Groovy Mama, can I try your organic brownies?”
Happy Mother's Day!