So, like most current and future English majors (I'm current), I am poor; thus, there is a necessity for me to have a part-time job as I work through school. If you haven't guessed by the title, I work as a pizza delivery driver. In this article I break down the Pros, the Cons, and the downright ridiculous nature of my job.

The Pros

Actually, bad news first...The Cons

1. The biggest con has to be the wear and tear on your vehicle. Nearly everyone I work with has had to do some sort of semi-major repair to their car at some point in the past year. My car was probably the worst of these. My entire axel came off my wheel; luckily I was pulling into a parking space when it happened, and not going 65 dodging drunk drivers and the homeless. Another lucky note is that there was a recall on that specific issue, and I'm pretty sure the (insert american motor company) corporation were just glad that they weren't paying for my funeral and a hefty lawsuit, so they were happy to pay for the towing and repair.

2. This part is going to show up twice. I'm hesitant to put it on the cons list, because the pros of this are so much higher, but sometimes you do have to deal with really annoying drunk people and not just the really happy tip fairy drunk people. For example, one night I turned down this road where they had done road work so they had the gigantic orange cones on the side of the road. Well, some drunken pedestrian thought it was hil-a-rious to pull all the cones out into the middle of the street and space them so it's an obstacle course for any car that had to pull down that road. Luckily, this type of drunk has been the exception not the rule.

3. Slow days are killers. When business is booming, so is the driver's own wallet, but when it is slow, it is devastating. I've walked out of slow shifts with $20 for 6 hours work. Sure, sure, my boss has to pay be 7.25/hr to stay legal, but once you've gotten used to making $10-$15/hr it is brutal. Which perfectly segues to the Pros section of this article...

The Pros

1. The money is pretty darn good if you work in an obese area like Upstate, SC, or pretty much anywhere in the south. Don't get me wrong, I love my pizza, but there are some people who we have a direct portal to their chimneys (because this is Harry Potter world and we have lots of floo powder) (parentheses b: Or we are Santa Claus). I've often times walked out of a 6 or 7 hour shift with over $100 in my pocket.

2. This also goes with the if it is busy qualifier: I get to sit around in my hot or cool car depending on the weather and listen to my music, or podcast, or audiobook, or sports talk radio station for hours at a time. If I have to work during the big game, I listen to it on the radio and follow the score updates on my phone. If I have to read a book for my class tomorrow, I buy the audiobook and hit play. There is so much freedom that you do not get at other jobs.

3. Back to the drunk people. I work in a college town, and on the weekends, after the bars close, our phones go crazy, and I get to see stop motion pictures of several train wrecks for a few hours. Sure it's awesome that drunk people tip a little better than non-drunk people, but the best part is some of the sights you see when people have no idea what's going on. One of my first nights ever working a guy opened the door and I looked into the kitchen to see a young student passed out on the counter with certain anatomical figures drawn on his face. Another occasion, one of my fellow drivers was given 3 beers for his tip. He did not consume them and drive; he just put them under his seat for when he got home later.


So, in conclusion, I definitely do not want to deliver pizzas for the rest of my life, but for a part-time job in college that is filled with entertainment value and better than minimum wage money, I'm going to have to give it a thumbs up.