This sorry game called love!

Hands holding

Typical story: boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with girl. Boy asks girl to be his. Girl accepts. Boy and girl are a happy couple. Boy does something stupid. Girl gets mad. Girl breaks up with boy. Girl is alone. Boy is alone. Back to square one! This is a reflection of many relationships. Though deeply in love, one person usually commits an unpardonable or sometimes pardonable crime that the other partner just can't move past. Relationships are broken, hearts are unmended but...has love really died?

Too many people in relationships burn their bridges before their 'bridges''were even demolished to begin with. They end relationships not even sure why and end up alone, frustrated because they have not really gotten over the 'ex'. What do they do next? Instead of trying to make amends and approaching their love interest, they resort to games to try to win back the person; games often concocted by friends and relatives. Before they know it, their heart felt desire to win back love has resorted to childish games of cat and mouse to see who will be victorious over who. But what they never realize and probably never will is that love is not a game. It never was. Love is an emotion, deep and poignant that converts into actions. Love is not for the faint hearted or the cowardly nor is it for the game players...

...She broke up with him! She felt like she was being smothered in the relationship so she dumped him point blank. He was hurt but respected her space and walked away. He had heard the saying, 'If you love something, set it free...' So..he set her free. Now, she watches couples holding hands and she misses him. She misses his smile, the way he made her feel, the little things he did for her. Now, she realizes he truly loved her and that feeling of being smothered was just her initial reaction to being loved by someone for the first time in her life. She was not accustomed to that feeling so it had hit her like a tonne of bricks. Now she misses love and wants love back!

She resorts to her friends. What are friends for if not to give you advice, right? Right?

"Girl! You can't go begging! You've got to play your game right to win him back! You've got to act hard to get!" they say. All she wants is him back so she willingly complies.....

He, on the other hand still misses her. He has never stopped loving her nor will he ever! He wants her back too.

"Don't be dumb!" The boys say. "You'll look like you're pussy whipped! She dumped you, didn't she? Leave her alone or let her come begging. That's what guys do!"

So...she sees him on the street. She's with her girlfriends. Her heart longs for him but she looks the other way. She's listening to the girls. They've got men, haven't they? So their advice must be worth something.

He sees her. She looks so pretty! But he turns away too.

Both are in love but are playing the 'love game' to see who will win. Neither knows that the other is their game opponent. Neither knows that sometimes in games there are no winners...

He goes to the club, feeling so lonely without her. Sure, he's with his boys but they don't compare to what they shared...Wow! There she sits, as beautiful as Aphrodite, except she does not sit alone. He feels hurt and jealousy as she gives her attention to another...guy. Her friends have told her this is how one plays the 'love game'.

"Go flirt with a woman! Get her jealous!" He does as he is told, unwillingly. Talks to the cutest girl he can get. She sees him. She's jealous too. She is jealous. He is jealous. They both feel like kicking their dates!

He tries to call her later that night. He wants to tell her he's sorry and that girl meant nothing to him.

She feels silly and wants to tell him she's not with that guy. Heck, she doesn't even like the guy!

They both reach for the phone then stop. Let her call me first, he thinks. Let him call me first, she thinks.

Neither ever calls that night.



He has thought of her so many times that he feels he's going mad.

She has thought of him so many times, she can't eat. But her friends tell her she's a fool if she begs. She'll make women look bad, give women a bad name. Groveling over a man! Ha! Real women don't do that!

He's warned by friends not to be a beggar. You gave her so many chances, they say. You treated her like a princess. And what did she do? She spit in your face! Let the b---- beg you!

She cries at nights and begs her phone to ring. She misses him so much! She's starting to hate this love game.

Everytime he sees his phone, he whispers a pray then turns away..Love shouldn't be this hard.

Five months later...she's going to see a movie with her girls. Is that a familiar face she sees two rows in front of her? Nooo! Her heart sinks into her chest. He's with someone else...and he looks so in love! Tears cloud her eyes and she gets up and leaves. Her friends stare, confused- ignorant of the damage they caused. As for him...he never knew how much she really loved him. He will never know.

So... he found someone knew and started afresh. In his heart he said-she's pretty but she will never be you...but she's a good substitute...! And...he learned to love. Never knowing love was just a game away.

This is life's lessons to us. Too many times, we meet love and take it for granted. Friends and relatives might play an active or passive role in our relationship decisions; in our dumping, in our being dumped, in our gaining love and in our losing love. We treat love like if it were a football match-the more points we score off and on the field, the closer we are to winning.

Love is not like that. Love is not a game, but if played like a game, the results are catostrophic! People get hurt. Hearts die.

Some of us may find twenty loves in our lifetime; some of us may just find that one person who would be our soulmate; some of us can get off the ground and dust our feet and move on after a broken heart; some of us never recover throughout our lifetime.

When you truly find someone who loves you, treat him or her like an investment or asset. Cause you never know your luck in this life; you never know if you will meet love again or if it will pass you by. Don't treat love as a game but if you do-know  that there are only casualties in this sorry game called love!