How to Make it a Night That You will Both Enjoy

We work hard. We have jobs, we have homes, we have kids - in short we have responsibilities.  But so many times we forget what it is to relax and truly enjoy one another.  In order to keep our love strong, we need to be rejuvenated.  That is why it is so important for each of us to spend time with our mates and give and receive love.

Doing that is another matter.  So many times we treat our relaxation like it is a job.  We can be demanding, strict, punctual, and critical.  These qualities do little to create an environment in which we can unwind.  Here are the top three things you must do to make your evening out an enjoyable one for the both of you.

Talk shop before you leave.
Taking time to relax means that the worries of life just melt away. So make sure that if you need to talk about the kids, work, the car, the in-laws, you do it before you leave.  You must try and talk about these things before you start getting ready.  That is right, getting ready is part of the evening as well.  It is a buffer time in which you can reset your mind for relaxation.  Get all the responsibility items on the table beforehand.  And if you mate asks to talk about it later, try to respect that.  Now is the time to set everything aside to reconnect.

Enter the zone of no judgments.
Being critical is an energy drainer.  You would not believe how long it takes a person to recover after just one critical comment.  So make sure that all your expectations are on the table well before the evening starts.

  • Do you want them to dress up?
  • Do you need them to do any chores before you leave?
  • Do reservations need to be made?
  • Do any other arrangements need to be made?
  • Do you have any unresolved conflict?

Talk about these things days before the evening if possible.  It is not fair to spring something on your mate right before you leave.  So talk about them. Be intentional.  If you think of something last-minute, it doesn't do anyone any good.

Once you are on the outing, make sure that compliments, not criticism, sprinkle the conversation.  Making the other person comfortable is paramount.  If this is the rule of the evening, both of you will be able to relax, enjoy each other's company, and lasting memories will be made.

Be silly and wax philosophical.  Quote love quotes to each other.  Talk about the big things, not the little things.  Now is the time to hear you lover and for you to hear them.  Let them freely express their thoughts and, in turn, express yours.  Make up your own proverbs, love quotes, and maxims on life.  Don't be afraid to engage each other at the heart of yourselves.

Do not expect miracles.
An evening out is not a cure-all.  It is still the same relationship, the same person, and the same life once you return to it.  An evening out is a time to reconnect, remember why you fell in love, and build lasting memories.  But honestly think back on your best memories with each other.  Most are probably of where something went gone wrong and the two of you made the best of it.  And love grew in spite of the circumstance.  So if you are looking for the perfect evening, it doesn't exist.  Perfection comes when you take an imperfect evening and your bond grows because of it.

Take these three rules and go have fun.  Reconnect, share life, and learn to appreciate the other.  This is the stuff of a love that lasts a lifetime.  You must learn to love their faults and quirks and you will see that your night out will turn into more than just a few hours away from everything.  It could be the start of a whole new chapter in your love.