Top 10 Lies that Are Good for Business

Can you really go about your existence without telling a lie? That is almost impossible because the truth can get you in a lot of problems. That is why the world is full of liars and there are those who make a profession out of it and they are called pathological liars. At times, the truth is better left unsaid. Some claim that women liar more than men but, men tell bigger lies. No matter what, lying is part of what makes us humans, and it can be interesting to go through the list of some famous lies and why they are good for business. The medicated solution would be to ban lying and make it a captial offense. You would need to  build a prison the size of the US to hold everyone.

I'll be there in 5 minutes: This is a way to say that you are efficient and are good at time management. The problem is, most of those who say they will be there in 5 minutes are lying. You invite someone for dinner at 6pm and at 6:15, the person says he will be there in 5 minutes. The problem is, he lives half an hour away and hasn’t left home when you called. That is a big fat lie. Why is it good for business? Think about the amount of money you waste calling or sending text messages. Think about having to reheat the food you’ve already cooked or leave the oven running because some useless friend can’t get his priorities right.

Where just friends, he’s like my little brother: How many people do you know who are dating their little brothers or blushing when they talk about their younger sibling? This is a lie because there is nothing like we are just friends between and woman and a man. There is also nothing like my little brother. This is good for business because you will have to hide and go on a date at locations further from your home because you don’t want to be seen dating your so called brother. You don’t get free meals because you won’t be invited to your friend’s house because you are “just friends”. Everything you do will cost you more because you are a deceitful born liar.

I have read and accepted all terms and conditions: This is a way for companies to force you to commit to things you don’t understand. The terms and conditions are so long that you would often need a lawyer to decipher all the gibberish. Like everyone, you lie and click, yes. I have read and I accepted all the terms and conditions. The problem is, you don’t know what you are getting yourself into. When Facebook or Pinterest later sell your data to third parties and make millions, you will hire a lawyer to try to get your hands on some of the cash, but, because you lied, you don’t get a dime. It is good for someone’s business because you can’t be bothered to read those long worded contracts.

I don't like Justin Bieber: He is so annoying and makes music for love-crazed 12 year olds lacking intellectual integrity. The perceived conception is that Justin Bieber is always trending because of this pizza face teenagers. The truth is, many Beliebers are older than your average grandmother. Why are you ashamed to admit that you own all the records of Justin Bieber and you worship at the altar like your regular possessed Beliebers? Well, it is good for business to live in denial when you buy that DVD and CDs, and claim it is for your teenage daughter called David.

I did not have sexual relations with that woman: This is the mother of all lies and a good one at that. You have to do what you have to do when your presidency it at stake. Why bother telling the world what it already knows. Good old Bill Clinton pulled a fast one and went on to write a book about it. That made him millions because everyone was expecting to read about all the salacious details. Why did he commit adultery? There are two reasons floating around. One, Hilary wasn’t doing her job, and the second reason, Monica was available. He lied under oath but who cares. All politicians are a bunch of liars anyway. That said, business was good and brisk as be became even more popular after that.

I've got to go, someone’s on the other line: At moments like these, you would even entertain a telesales person to save you from that telephone call you can’t get away from. Lying is bad and there is no other way to look at it, but, when you are in a situation like talking to an annoying friend that can’t take a hint, you will accept any form of distraction. Why is it good for business, you will either have to put the phone down and call someone you really want to talk to just in case that friend calls back to check on you. The phone company will love you for your business.

I'm over him or her: You never really get over an ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend because your brain will not let you. There are times you want revenge but you might be too afraid of the consequences. The worst is when you can’t stop talking about him or her and that is of course a dead giveaway that you still harbor sentiments. You will lie and tell others you are over him or her but you are still going to the gym to get in shape and show him what his missing. You change your wardrobe to look younger and fitter just to get back at him. You are not fooling anyone, but, that is not a problem because it is good for business. Gym membership isn’t particularly cheap and new clothes can cost you a lot.

What a cute little baby: That is a terrible lie that most parents want to hear. It is true that most babies are just ugly but you can start World War III if you were to tell a mother that her baby is ugly. If you don’t know what to say, talk about the beautiful clothing or how the baby has got so much hair. Say what you have to say but don’t tell the truth. It is none of your business. Babies are good for business because you have to bring a gift along when you visit.

This is not what it looks like: A guy gets caught by police paying for sex and comes up with such a lousy excuse. Another situation is when police officers are caught abusing their authority and they try to lie about it. This is not what it looks like is such a lame thing to say. If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it must be a pathological liar. What about a man getting caught by his wife with another woman. What does it look like? Someone will be getting his behind kicked. These scenarios are good for business because someone will be getting  divorced and lawyers are known to be sharks. Police officers losing their jobs and the police department getting sued for millions of dollars.

It’s not you, it’s me: What is that supposed to mean? Nothing! I am dumping you but you can blame me as I take full responsibility for everything. I can’t tell you how grateful I am to have met you and how you have enriched my existence. That is why I feel the need to move on and do something better with my life. A load of nonsense.