Save My Relationship
Unhealthy relationships aren't good for us and we know this, however, it seems that more and more people are becoming involved in them. It could be that society has gone so far downhill that we don't know anymore what a healthy relationship is. Then again we may know, but are clueless as how to break the cycle because it's become an addiction.
Unhealthy relationships can be addictive and the sad part is that many times the people involved don't know it. This is because most of them, if not all, are raised in a dysfunctional family environment. So, this feels and sounds normal, it's all they know. Consequently, a pattern of unhealthy behaviors continue to worsen.
In order to stop unhealthy relationships you first need to recognize that you're in one. To do this you need to know what a healthy one is. If you've never experienced a healthy relationship then you will continue the cycle until it becomes unbearable.
Unfortunately, most people don't come to their senses until something really traumatic occurs. This could be emotional or physical, all they know is that something is wrong and things have gotten out of control. Once it gets to this stage one of them will be so desperate for peace that they start looking for ways to get it.
Once again they may go in a wrong direction and turn to drugs or alcohol since they don't know how to handle the situation. Then things really take a turn for the worse. It doesn't matter if it's family, friends or a couple, unhealthy relationships know no bounds, so the cycle repeats itself.
There is nowhere to go from here, but up or else stay this way forever, and some do. However, there's hope and there is something you can do to stop the cycle of involvement in unhealthy relationships. The first thing you need to do is seek help and not isolate. Hiding and being anti-social makes matters worse.
You see, many times they're all or nothing people, so it's one extreme to the next. The solution is balance, but balance is foreign to them. Therefore, they need someone who is balanced to guide and them in the healing process.
Therapy is one way to stop unhealthy relationships as well as 12 step groups. If you are a Christian your pastor can instruct you in using biblical principles to change behavior patterns. In addition, boundaries need to be set and respect as well as trust issues must be learned or change will be short lived.
If there was never a healthy foundation in place then you have to build from the ground up, there's no easy way to do it. It will be tough, because of addiction to drama and the urge to fall back into old patterns of behavior.
Finally, recovery may take years, therefore, patience, persistence and consistency is necessary to achieve a healthy pattern of living, so take your time and don't rush into anything.