Allow me to get straight to the point: Yes, I love wearing those crazy toe socks around the house; yes, I am a guy (or "dude" or "male" or "man" or whatever moniker you prefer); and yes, I am completely serious.
I'll make a huge assumption here and assume one of the following:
- You're a female, and are saying to yourself: "Duh, toe socks are crazy comfortable, I've known that for years." Or...
- You're a male, and are saying to yourself: "This guy has gone off the deep end. I don't know who he is, but I'm never inviting him over to watch the Super Bowl."
Let me be the first to tell all the ladies out there: You are right. You've been right. All of jokes and comments I've made about those "goofy" socks you've been wearing for years have been unwarranted. You withstood some serious heckling from me, stood your ground, continued wearing your toe socks (even in the face of my incessant mocking) and prevailed in the end.
Why? Because I've actually tried them now. And for all the hard times I've given you about them, I'll admit that these seemingly gimmicky toe socks are actually very comfortable.
I'm A Guy And I Like Toe Socks
Does that make me less of a man? Heck no! In fact, it makes me more of a man. Because while the rest of the "manly-men" are flapping their jaws about how un-dude-like a pair of toe socks makes a guy, I'm sitting at home in total comfort, watching more sports and TV animal attacks than any of them.
And while I have gotten some very strange looks from some of my buddies, I laugh my head off while they're tromping around in work boots because their feet are too cold in the early morning or late evening.
If you've read this far, you're probably wondering...
Why I Tried On Toe Socks In The First Place
Good question. And let me be the first to say I resisted this. I've seen my gal friends wearing these funny things for years, and heckled them the entire time. I was never by any means a proponent of toe socks from the start.
What broke my fast was when a friend of mine bought me a pair as a present. It was more of a gag gift than anything else, at least that's the way it felt at the time (hint: I was gagging). Within days, my brightly-colored, rainbow toe socks were buried in the depths of my sock drawer, only seeing the light of day through the holes in my regular socks.
Until one particularly lazy morning when the temperature hadn't quite warmed up and my floors were still rather chilly around the house. Anxious to spend the entire day rotting in front of the TV watching whatever sporting events were on at the time, I decided to give the toe socks a whirl.
And to my complete surprise, I actually liked them.
They kept me warm and comfortable. I'd go so far as to say they are fulfilled their duties much better than a pair of my standard white athletic socks would have. Maybe it's because all of my toes were wrapped up? Or maybe because the materials are thicker? Who knows, all I know is that they worked.
Ladies: You were right.
Fellas: Try toe socks before you knock them, you might actually like them (and no, I won't tell your buddies)