Love hopes all things love endures all things. So says the King James translation of the bible, in a part that originally was about charity. Charity being defined as an un-equal love. Where one party, such as God, has so much more to give than the other party that the love does not flow equally in both directions. Charity means something slightly different in today's lexicon but not by much. Any time you feel you can't break up with your mate, because you don't want to "hurt" them, you are treating them like a charity case, like an unequal partner.

People don't always realize it can be just as "ouch" to be in a relationship where you are aware your spouse doesn't care for you, as it is to get kicked to the curb. At least once you get dumped you can begin the healing process. As long as your mate strings you along you hold a false hope of things getting better. Things never get better if your mate has contempt for you. If fidelity is gone all bets are off. I had a ex-husband who cheated on me while we were married. I was so naif I didn't even think to suspect. I figured if he wanted someone else he would tell me he was done with me. What a dummy I was.

Romantic love is funny in that it's usually not very loving at all. It's usually all about the candy and the flowers, cheap shots. Any guy can download an app that tells him where the best clubs are. He can dress to impress, sot you in wine, none of that has to do with real love. A guy who cares for you would be more concerned about the tires on your car being in good shape than buying you another pair of earrings. A guy who wanted to make your life better would come over an shovel the snow out of your driveway. That would be romantic.

Hollywood wants to make us believe Real Love is dramatic. Marriage and divorce is usually about dashed expectations over stuff like that. It's hard to believe, but there still are too many women out there who think their husband is going to look like Fabio and bring them breakfast in bed. They really don't value a man who brings home a study paycheck and loves with fidelity. Two generations of broken homes attest to how cunningly our country has rotted. Fidelity is more than monogamy. A man with your best interests at heart is your main encouragement. He wouldn't be controlling or jealous. He would care for you more as a person than caring for the relationship to continue. He would be altruistic and agenda free.

By the same token, if you love someone, you don't seek to destroy them. You wouldn't want to take them down with you if you lost your job or your health. You would be careful of their person and their things. You wouldn't think all the time of what that person could do for you, you would more often think of what you could do for them - not in a co-dependent manner. In an authentic manner. You wouldn't give love in order to get it. You would give love freely, without thought for return.