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You really shouldn’t believe what you see on the internet. Why? Because people are paid to try to fool you, that’s why. I don’t write fake ads normally, but I agreed to do some freelance work for a guy who needed it without finding out what it was he wanted. Turns out his job is providing fake ads for a company. Since I had already agreed, I went ahead and gave it a shot, but there were actually more issues than my dislike of lying. He’s in the UK and he was asking me to write about systems I’ve never experienced.
Well, I gave it my best shot, despite having no idea how the system really worked, and ended up with five fake ads that have no other purpose than to trick you into buying something from his company. He never paid for them, and I assumed never used them, so I’ll use them in a different way. Here are two of my fake ads. Ads designed to read as if someone really experienced the process. You tell me if I did a good job of convincing you that this was truly the process I went through and what I learned.
Ad One, About “Broadband”
I’ve been considering moving abroad for so long that I’m having a hard time believing that I’m actually entering the planning stages. The more I think about it, the longer the list seems to get. Some things are easy – bring this, don’t bring that, but some things are country specific and require a lot more thought. Before I can really start making decisions about what I need to do, or get, I guess I really have to nail down the things I need (vs want) and the things I need soon (rather than acquire gradually). For some people the ‘need’ category might include a nearby coffee shop, but for me, I need internet – preferably good, cheap broadband.
Now I suppose it’s possible to get along with internet at the coffee shop, but the uncertainty of relying on someone else would drive me up the wall. Maybe I take this a little too seriously, but it’s important to me to know that when I turn on my computer, I have a connection. I need to know that I can download files reasonably quickly, and skype my family without strangers listening in. Yes, OK, I want my social media connections too. Hey, I’m only human. Whatever the details, cheap broadband is suddenly at the top of my ‘need’ list.
I assumed that my UK options would be similar to my US options, meaning almost no options. At my house I have two choices. Period. It’s possible this is because I live in a small town, but I don’t think so. Anyway, I figured that when considering the UK I would need to peg down a place to live before I knew what my broadband options would be. Well guess what. No. They have choices. Lots of choices. You can search for ‘cheap broadband deals’ in the UK and all kinds of internet providers come up.
Seriously, try it. The UK has an amazing selection of broadband providers, and a huge range of prices. And just as with US companies, if you package your broadband with your phone you can get some screaming deals. I guess I’ll need a new phone, too, once I’ve moved, so I can knock of two problems with one solution. Always a bonus when the problem list is longer than the patience. There are a few more differences that I’ll need to figure out, like what a ‘line charge’ is. At my house I pay one bill without any breakdown in the description. This probably means I don’t really know what I’m paying for, which is one more reason why I’m planning on living abroad, but that’s another story altogether.
OK, where were we? Cheap broadband deals. Lots of them. Bundled with phone packages. Hm, phone….. At my house here I have phone reception for only one provider (small town), same story in the UK? Do I need to look up coverage areas, or should I just wait until I’m closer to choosing a location? Sigh. One more thing to add to the list, I guess.
Ad Two, About “Internet”
How do you set up your house to have internet access? The first step, of course, is to look around and find the best internet deals. A good broadband connection is a monthly investment and you want to take the time upfront to make sure that what you’ve chosen will be the best deal for you. In this article we’ll go through some of the most common features and the pros and cons of each.
Startup deals. Most companies offer an introductory price for new customers. Check to see how long you’ll pay the intro price, and what the cost will be when the offer ends. Also look for: upfront costs – do you have to buy equipment; additional monthly charges, such as line fees; and cancellation fees if you want to end the contract early. If you will need assistance setting up the equipment, find out what costs are associated with this. Don’t forget to see if you can score special internet deals through work, or student status.
Speed. Faster speeds mean higher costs. Consider what you’ll mainly be using your broadband for before deciding what speed to choose. If you mainly will be doing email and social media you’ll probably be fine with a slower speed; gamers and movie buffs will want to shell out for the fastest connection they can find.
Downloads. This is the amount of data you can use each month. The average internet user is unlikely to exceed 10GB, but if your household tends to stream videos or music, choose a package that provides unlimited downloads.
Package deals. You can usually get the best internet deals by packaging your services, most commonly phone service. If you’ll adding phone service, don’t forget to look at the terms of that contract as well. Consider what you need, and what the plan offers. Do you want nights and weekends free? Free landline calls? Fewer minutes for a lower price? A family plan? Customize your selection to your needs to get the greatest satisfaction for your money.
Contracts. The best savings come from longer contracts, but the cancellation fees can be hefty. Before signing up for a longer term, be certain that you won’t be changing your circumstance before the end of the contract. A student in transition, for example, might be better off choosing a six month, or even one month contract until she is settled in a job and planning to stay put for a while.
Once you’ve carefully gone through all of the decisions that need to be made and found the best internet deal for you, the next part is easy. Contact the provider and verify that the price you’ve found is correct. Go over the terms again to be certain you haven’t misunderstood anything or made any assumptions about what you’ll receive. Ask about any current specials such as gift cards or free equipment. Once you’ve clarified everything, the provider you’ve chosen will take you through the steps needed to get you started. You may need additional equipment or a technician to assist you depending on your situation and your provider will have all the answers to those questions. Good luck!
That's it. Plenty of lies in 500 words
What did you think? Convinced? Did you notice how much I talked about the product, and how many times I used the keywords? Using the same words over and over is usually a sign of a fake article. I've actually done a real review that you can compare this to and see the differences.